《The Ballad Of Billy Kershaw》歌词

歌曲： The Ballad Of Billy Kershaw

所属专辑：The Very Best Of Jake Thackray

歌手： Jake Thackray

时长： 04:35

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The Ballad Of Billy Kershaw - Jake Thackray[00:00:00]

He was small and baggy-trousered[00:00:06]

He was nondescript and shy[00:00:08]

But in his breast there burned a sacred flame[00:00:10]

For women melted and surrendered[00:00:13]

When they looked into his eyes[00:00:14]

Little Billy Kershaw was the name by the way[00:00:17]

He worked as a country ploughman so they say[00:00:20]

Oh Lothario and Casanova mighty Don Juan[00:00:22]

Those legendary goats of days of yore[00:00:26]

Billy was better with his eyes closed[00:00:29]

On one leg and with no hands[00:00:31]

A trick which he could actually perform[00:00:33]

By the way[00:00:35]

Spectacular but dodgy so they say[00:00:36]

He never did it for the profit of it[00:00:39]

Never for applause[00:00:41]

Only the silvery laughter that it caused[00:00:42]

There was a difference in that Billy[00:00:52]

Kershaw never picked the best[00:00:53]

The beautiful the golden ones[00:00:55]

That most men would[00:00:57]

But the ugly ones the poorest[00:00:58]

The despised the dispossessed[00:01:00]

Where else would a hunchback[00:01:02]

Get a cuddle by the way[00:01:03]

Harelips can kiss or so they say[00:01:05]

And so the shop-girl with the whiskers[00:01:08]

Or the limping shepherdess[00:01:10]

The squinting barmaid her with the pocky skin[00:01:12]

Even the horse-like countess with[00:01:15]

The teeth and meagre breasts[00:01:16]

Which in fact had often harboured[00:01:18]

Billy's chin by the way[00:01:19]

Haughty but snug so they say[00:01:21]

He never did it for the profit of it[00:01:24]

Never for applause[00:01:26]

Only the common comfort that it caused[00:01:28]

Many a poor distracted Catholic[00:01:38]

Rating Billy over Lourdes[00:01:39]

Came smiling down his staircase[00:01:41]

All her frenzy gone[00:01:42]

And the husband far from angry[00:01:44]

Would be chuffed that she was cured[00:01:46]

And buy him a pint in the local later on[00:01:47]

By the way[00:01:50]

Horses for courses as they say[00:01:51]

He responded to the colonel's[00:01:54]

Widow's desperate appeal[00:01:55]

In the Colonel's house upon the Colonel's tiger skin[00:01:57]

And in the potter's shop the potter's[00:02:00]

Wife upon the potter's wheel[00:02:02]

Which was steadily continuing to spin[00:02:03]

By the way[00:02:06]

A right tour de force so they say[00:02:07]

But never ever for the profit of it[00:02:10]

Never the applause[00:02:12]

Only the passing happiness it caused[00:02:13]

But soon the news of Billy Kershaw and[00:02:23]

His life-enhancing powers[00:02:24]

Became across the county widely known[00:02:26]

And by his cottage gate the coachloads[00:02:29]

Waited patiently for hours[00:02:31]

The drivers made a bundle going home[00:02:33]

By the way[00:02:35]

Their caps were full of silver so they say[00:02:36]

And the village did a roaring trade in[00:02:39]

Teas and souvenirs[00:02:41]

In ash trays and the local watercress[00:02:42]

Until Billy disillusioned simply ups[00:02:45]

And disappears[00:02:48]

Leaving no forwarding address by the way[00:02:49]

Could be anywhere at all or so they say[00:02:52]

But it was not for the profit of it[00:02:55]

Not for the applause[00:02:57]

Only the consolation that it caused[00:02:58]

If there should be a sad neglected[00:03:08]

Wretched woman in your life[00:03:10]

It could well be that Billy's near at hand[00:03:11]

Perhaps your auntie or your daughter[00:03:14]

Or your mother or your wife[00:03:16]

And when did you last see your grandma[00:03:18]

By the way[00:03:20]

No genuine case is ever turned away[00:03:21]

He's no rascal he's no charlatan[00:03:24]

No mountebank no snob[00:03:26]

Whoever you are he'll treat you just the same[00:03:28]

He is small and baggy-trousered[00:03:31]

And he does a tidy job[00:03:32]

Little Billy Kershaw is the name by the way[00:03:34]

He worked as a country ploughman so they say[00:03:37]

But never ever for the profit of it[00:03:40]

Never the applause[00:03:42]

Only the common comfort that it caused[00:03:44]

If you find that Billy's ballad is extravagant or trite[00:03:53]

Offensive irrelevant or untrue[00:03:57]

That may well be but here's a moral[00:04:00]

Which will make us feel all right[00:04:01]

A moral which may well apply to you[00:04:03]

By the way[00:04:05]

Takes one to know one as they say[00:04:07]

If you're ugly if you're weak or meek[00:04:09]

Or queer form a queue[00:04:11]

And the rest of us will travel from afar[00:04:13]

And systematically we'll do to you[00:04:16]

What Billy used to do[00:04:17]

But more regular and always twice[00:04:19]

As hard by the way[00:04:21]

Mea culpa mea culpa[00:04:22]

As they used to say[00:04:24]