《The Biggest Aspidistra in the World》歌词

歌曲： The Biggest Aspidistra in the World

所属专辑：A Retrospective Gracie Fields

歌手： Gracie Fields&Ray Noble

时长： 02:46

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The Biggest Aspidistra in the World - Gracie Fields/Ray Noble[00:00:00]

For years we had an aspidistra in a flower pot[00:00:07]

On the whatnot near the 'atstand in the 'all[00:00:13]

It didn't seem to grow until one day our brother Joe[00:00:19]

Had a notion that he'd make it strong and tall[00:00:23]

So he's crossed it with an acorn from an oak tree[00:00:29]

And he's planted it against the garden wall[00:00:36]

It shot up like a rocket [00:00:41]

'Til it's nearly reached the sky[00:00:44]

It's the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:00:47]

We couldn't see the top of it it got so blooming high[00:00:53]

It's the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:00:58]

When father's had a snoot full at his pub 'The Bunch of Grapes'[00:01:04]

He doesn't go all fighting mad and getting into scrapes[00:01:10]

No you'll find him in his bear-skin playing Tarzan of the apes[00:01:14]

Off the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:01:20]

We have to get it watered by the local fire brigade[00:01:27]

So they put the water rates up half a crown[00:01:31]

The roots stuff up the drains grow along the country lanes[00:01:36]

And they came up half a mile outside the town[00:01:41]

Once we hired an auditorium for a hot house[00:01:45]

But a jealous rival went and burnt it down[00:01:50]

The tom cats and their sweethearts love to spend their evenings out[00:01:57]

Up the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:02:02]

They all begin meowing when the buds begin to sprout[00:02:08]

From the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:02:13]

The dogs all come around for miles a lovely sight to see[00:02:18]

They sniff around for hours and hours and wag their tails with glee[00:02:24]

So I've had to put a notice up to say it's not a tree[00:02:29]

It's the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:02:34]