所属专辑:A Retrospective Gracie Fields
时长: 02:46
The Biggest Aspidistra in the World - Gracie Fields/Ray Noble[00:00:00]
For years we had an aspidistra in a flower pot[00:00:07]
On the whatnot near the 'atstand in the 'all[00:00:13]
It didn't seem to grow until one day our brother Joe[00:00:19]
Had a notion that he'd make it strong and tall[00:00:23]
So he's crossed it with an acorn from an oak tree[00:00:29]
And he's planted it against the garden wall[00:00:36]
It shot up like a rocket [00:00:41]
'Til it's nearly reached the sky[00:00:44]
It's the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:00:47]
We couldn't see the top of it it got so blooming high[00:00:53]
It's the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:00:58]
When father's had a snoot full at his pub 'The Bunch of Grapes'[00:01:04]
He doesn't go all fighting mad and getting into scrapes[00:01:10]
No you'll find him in his bear-skin playing Tarzan of the apes[00:01:14]
Off the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:01:20]
We have to get it watered by the local fire brigade[00:01:27]
So they put the water rates up half a crown[00:01:31]
The roots stuff up the drains grow along the country lanes[00:01:36]
And they came up half a mile outside the town[00:01:41]
Once we hired an auditorium for a hot house[00:01:45]
But a jealous rival went and burnt it down[00:01:50]
The tom cats and their sweethearts love to spend their evenings out[00:01:57]
Up the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:02:02]
They all begin meowing when the buds begin to sprout[00:02:08]
From the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:02:13]
The dogs all come around for miles a lovely sight to see[00:02:18]
They sniff around for hours and hours and wag their tails with glee[00:02:24]
So I've had to put a notice up to say it's not a tree[00:02:29]
It's the biggest aspidistra in the world[00:02:34]