《Three Ha’Pence A Foot》歌词

歌曲： Three Ha’Pence A Foot

所属专辑：The Classic Monologues (Digitally Remastered)

歌手： Stanley Holloway

时长： 04:12

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Three Ha'pence A Foot - Stanley Holloway[00:00:00]

I'll tell you an old fashioned story[00:00:05]

That Grandfather used to relate[00:00:07]

Of a joiner and building contractor[00:00:09]

Is name it were Sam Oglethwaite[00:00:12]

In a shop on the banks of the Irwell[00:00:14]

Old Sam used to follow is trade[00:00:17]

In a place you'll have eard of called Bury[00:00:19]

You know where black puddings is made[00:00:22]

One day Sam were filling a knot ole[00:00:26]

Wi putty when in thro the door[00:00:28]

Came an old feller fair wreathed wi whiskers[00:00:31]

Tould chap said good morning I'm Noah[00:00:34]

Sam asked Noah what was is business[00:00:37]

And tould chap went on to remark[00:00:40]

That not liking the look of the weather[00:00:43]

E were thinking of building an Ark[00:00:45]

E d gotten the wood for the bulwarks[00:00:47]

And all tother shipbuilding junk[00:00:51]

And wanted some nice Bird's Eye Maple[00:00:53]

To panel the side of is bunk[00:00:56]

Now Maple were Sam's Monopoly[00:00:58]

That means it were all is to cut[00:01:01]

And nobody else adn't got none[00:01:04]

So e asked Noah three ha'pence a foot[00:01:06]

A ha'penny too much replied Noah[00:01:10]

A Penny a foot's more the mark[00:01:13]

A penny a foot and when t'rain comes[00:01:15]

I'll give you a ride in me Ark[00:01:18]

But neither would budge in the bargain[00:01:20]

The whole daft thing were kind of a jam[00:01:23]

So Sam put is tongue out at Noah[00:01:26]

And Noah made Long Bacon* at Sam[00:01:28]

In wrath and ill feeling they parted[00:01:32]

Not knowing when they'd meet again[00:01:35]

And Sam had forgot all about it[00:01:37]

Til one day it started to rain[00:01:40]

It rained and it rained for a fortni't[00:01:43]

And flooded the ole countryside[00:01:47]

It rained and it kept on raining[00:01:50]

Til the Irwell were fifty mile wide[00:01:53]

The couses were soon under water[00:01:56]

And folks to the roof ad to climb[00:01:59]

They said twas the rottenest summer[00:02:02]

That Bury ad ad for some time[00:02:05]

The rain showed no sign of abating[00:02:07]

And water rose hour by hour[00:02:10]

Til the only dry land were at Blackpool[00:02:12]

And that were on top of the Tower[00:02:15]

So Sam started swimming to Blackpool[00:02:18]

It took 'im best part of a week[00:02:21]

Is clothes were wet through when'e got there[00:02:23]

And s boots were beginning to leak[00:02:26]

E stood to is watch chain in water[00:02:28]

On Tower top just before dark[00:02:31]

When who should come sailing towards i'm[00:02:34]

But old Noah steering is Ark[00:02:37]

They stared at each other in silence[00:02:39]

Til Ark were alongside all but[00:02:43]

Then Noah said What price yer Maple[00:02:45]

Sam answered Three ha'pence a foot[00:02:48]

Noah said Nay I'll make thee an offer[00:02:51]

The same as I did t'other day[00:02:54]

A penny a foot and a free ride[00:02:57]

Now come on lad what does tha say[00:03:00]

Three hapence a foot came the answer[00:03:03]

So Noah is sail ad to hoist[00:03:07]

And sailed off again in a dudgeon[00:03:09]

While Sam stood determined but moist[00:03:11]

Noah cruised around flying is pigeons[00:03:15]

Til fortieth day of the wet[00:03:19]

And on is way back passing Blackpool[00:03:21]

E saw old Sam standing there yet[00:03:24]

Is chin just stuck out of the water[00:03:27]

A comical figure e cut[00:03:31]

Noah said Now what's the price of yer Maple[00:03:33]

Sam answered Three ha'pence a foot[00:03:37]

Said Noah Yed best take my offer[00:03:41]

It's last time I'll be hereabout[00:03:44]

And if water comes half an inch higher[00:03:47]

I'll happen get Maple for nowt[00:03:50]

Three hapence a foot it'll cost yer[00:03:53]

And as fer me Sam said don't fret[00:03:56]

The sky's took a turn since this morning[00:03:59]

I think it'll brighten up yet[00:04:03]