[00:00:02] -Thanks for the tasty dinner. -You're welcome for a tasty dinner. 谢谢你煮的好料 随时都欢迎
[00:00:07] What are you guys looking at? 你们在看什么？
[00:00:09] Ross and the most beautiful girl in the world. 罗斯和宇宙无敌第一美女
[00:00:11] Yeah,come to Papa! 好骚的娘儿们
[00:00:19] I know! 我知道
[00:00:22] Probably the only time I'll say this... 这实在不像我会说的话
[00:00:24] ...but did you see the ass on her? 但你们看到她的屁股了吗？
[00:00:27] What did you...? When did you...? 你是…你是…
[00:00:29] How did you...? How did you get a girl like that? 你怎么… 你怎么把到那种货色的？
[00:00:34] So what is she,like a spokesmodel? An aerobics instructor? 她是谁，代言模特儿？ 有氧舞蹈教练？
[00:00:38] Actually,she's a paleontology doctoral candidate... 她是古生物学博士候选人
[00:00:42] ...specializing in the Cenozoic Era. 专攻新生代
[00:00:44] But that's,like,the easiest era. 不过那是最简单的时代
[00:00:48] I've seen her at work, but I always figured.... 我在馆里见过她，但总觉得…
[00:00:53] But I made her dinner. 总之我做饭给她吃
[00:00:56] We had a great time. And we're going out again tomorrow. 我们聊得很愉快 明天还要见面
[00:01:02] Maybe her friends are betting to see who gets the biggest geek. 也许她跟朋友打赌 谁能钓到最怪的怪胎
[00:01:06] Fine by me. Hope she wins. 我无所谓，祝她胜利
[00:01:11] Hey,we should have a contest. Yeah. 我们也应该来比
[00:01:14] See who can bring home the most beautiful woman. 看谁带回来的女生最漂亮
[00:01:17] That's a good idea,Joe. We could call it life. 好主意 名称就叫“真实人生”
[00:01:22] The One with the Dirty Girl 本集播出：“送礼风波”
[00:02:09] You have any wrapping paper? 有包装纸吗？
[00:02:11] Is it for my birthday present? 你要包我的生日礼物？
[00:02:13] It was your birthday months ago. 你生日都过了1个月
[00:02:16] You said you ordered something special and it just hadn't come yet. 对，但你说订了特别的东西 还没送来
[00:02:23] I have a call in about that. 我有接到电话
[00:02:27] It's for Kathy. It's an early copy of her favorite book. 这是给凯西的生日礼物 是她最喜欢的书的早期版本
[00:02:31] The Velveteen Rabbit! 是“天鹅绒兔宝宝”
[00:02:34] When the boy's love makes the rabbit real.... 天哪 当男孩的爱让它变成真兔子…
[00:02:37] Don't touch it because your fingers have destructive oils. 好，别摸，你的手有油污
[00:02:41] Then you'd better keep it away from Ross' hair. 那你最好别靠近罗斯的头发
[00:02:46] This is pretty rare. How did you get that? 这很珍贵，你是怎么找到的？
[00:02:49] No big deal. I just went to some bookstores... 没什么，我只是跑了几家书店 问了几个书商
[00:02:52] ...talked to some dealers,called some of the author's grandchildren. 联络了几个作者的孙子
[00:02:56] Honey,that's so sweet. 真是太感人了
[00:02:58] What a great way to say,"l secretly love you,roommate's girlfriend." 完全宣告了 “室友的马子，我在暗恋你”
[00:03:04] It doesn't say that. 哪会啊…
[00:03:06] Does it? 会吗？
[00:03:08] How will it look when you get her something incredibly meaningful... 你自己看嘛 你送的礼物别具意义又昂贵
[00:03:12] ...and expensive,and her boyfriend, Joey,gives her an orange? 她的男朋友却送她一个柳橙
[00:03:17] I'll make sure Joey gets her something really great. 好 我会叫乔伊送她很好的礼物
[00:03:20] It's got to be better than that book. 可得比那本书还好
[00:03:23] Like a crossbow! 像十字弓啦
[00:03:27] Once again,I am sorry. 真的很抱歉
[00:03:29] Thank you. Bye. 谢谢，再见
[00:03:32] I had to turn down a job catering a funeral for 60 people. 我推掉一个60人的丧礼外烩
[00:03:36] Oh,my God! What happened? 天哪，出了什么事？
[00:03:39] Sixty guests. 是60个“客人”
[00:03:45] Why'd you have to turn it down? 你为什么要推掉？
[00:03:47] I don't have the money or equipment... 因为我没有钱和用具
[00:03:49] ...to handle something that big on such short notice. 可以临时接这种大生意
[00:03:53] Wow,what is with all the negativity? 这么消极是怎么回事？
[00:03:56] You sound like "Moni-can't," not "Moni-can"! 你好像“摩妮不可” 而不是“摩妮可”
[00:04:04] You've been playing around with this catering for years. 你办外烩都3年多了
[00:04:07] -Do you want to be a caterer? -I don't know. 你到底想不想当外烩厨师？ 我不知道
[00:04:10] There you go! That's the spirit! 这就对了！
[00:04:14] If you need money,I will lend you money. Just get moving! 你需要钱我借你，你就接吧
[00:04:18] Really? I'd need $500 for all the food and supplies. 真的？我需要5百元来采买
[00:04:26] -Neither have you. -Yes,but I'm doing this. 你也是 但我正在资助你
[00:04:37] -Can I borrow your apartment keys? -Why? 你家的钥匙借我 为什么？
[00:04:44] You can pee here. 你可以在这里尿啊
[00:04:49] Yes,I can,of course. 也对
[00:04:53] It's okay. The duck's using our bathroom anyway. 不好意思 反正刚好鸭子也在用浴室
[00:04:59] What are you getting for her birthday? 你要送她什么生日礼物？
[00:05:02] We've been dating a couple weeks. I got to get her something? 我们才交往2星期也要送吗？
[00:05:06] You have to get her something really nice. 要啊 不但要送，还要送得很好
[00:05:10] -I know! -And not one of your coupons... 有了！ 1小时的...
[00:05:12] ...for an hour of "Joey Love." ...乔伊猛男体验券不算
[00:05:20] -A crossword! Can I help? -No. 填字游戏！我可以帮忙吗？ 不行
[00:05:23] Last week I got all but three answers... 对不起 可是上星期我几乎全答对了
[00:05:25] ...and I want to finish one without any help. 我很想独力完成一次
[00:05:28] Fine. 好
[00:05:30] But you can't help me develop my new universal language. 那你也不能帮我研发新宇宙语
[00:05:35] How'd it go? 怎么样？
[00:05:37] Oh,my God! It was the best funeral ever! 天哪，这个葬礼太棒了
[00:05:41] Everyone loved the food. 每个人都说好吃
[00:05:43] I even got another funeral for tomorrow. 我还接了明天的另一场葬礼
[00:05:45] The dead guy from today's best friend. 是今天的死者的死党
[00:05:48] It's like I am the official caterer for that accident. 我成了那场事故的指定外烩
[00:05:52] Mon,I'm so happy for you! 我真替你高兴
[00:05:54] Thanks. Check out my new catering stuff. 谢了，你看我的新用具
[00:05:57] Look! I'm an omelet station! 看，我可以去卖蛋卷
[00:06:00] Omelet? Made to order? 要特制蛋卷吗？
[00:06:03] I'll have one,please. Plus my money. 请给我一份，还有我的钱
[00:06:08] I didn't realize you needed it right away. 我不晓得你马上就要
[00:06:10] You told me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I be'd. 你叫我去当外烩厨师 我就去了
[00:06:15] I used it to buy all this stuff. 我把钱都花掉了
[00:06:17] Aborigine. “原住民”！
[00:06:22] 不对
[00:06:24] I got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back then. 我明天还有生意 到时就能还你
[00:06:28] Okay. Sorry I acted like a bank. 好，抱歉刚才一副银行嘴脸
[00:06:33] Aborigine. Oh,no,I tried that already. “原住民”！ 不对，我已经试过了
[00:06:50] Would you like to come in? 你要进来吗？
[00:06:52] Did Homo erectus hunt with wooden tools? 直立人是用木器打猎吗？
[00:06:58] According to recent findings. 最新证据显示是的
[00:07:11] Here,Mitzi! Here,Mitzi! 蜜琪来，蜜琪来
[00:07:15] Mitzi is...? 蜜琪是…
[00:07:17] My hamster. 我的仓鼠
[00:07:19] I hope she's okay. I haven't seen her in a while. 但愿它没事，好久没见到它了
[00:07:23] Have a seat. 请坐
[00:07:24] Where? （坐哪里？）
[00:07:27] Oh,hey. Do you.... 对了，你…
[00:07:33] Do you have any Cinnamon Fruit Toasties? 你有肉桂水果烤吐司吗？
[00:07:37] Well,I do. 什么？ 我有
[00:07:40] Let's go back to my place, light a couple candles... 我们回我家去，点几根蜡烛
[00:07:44] ...break open a box of Cinnamon Fruit Toasties.... 开一盒肉桂水果烤吐司
[00:07:49] -I'd rather not. -Oh,yeah? Why not? 还是不要好了 为什么？
[00:07:54] Don't take this the wrong way... 我没有恶意
[00:07:56] ...but your place kind of has a weird smell. 但是你家有一股怪味
[00:08:07] -ls everything in the car? -Did you settle the bill? 东西都上车了？ 对，钱拿到了吗？
[00:08:11] I hate this part. 还没，我最讨厌要钱了
[00:08:14] Look what we almost left! 差点忘了这个
[00:08:16] That's not mine. 那不是我的
[00:08:18] Look what we almost took! 差点偷了这个
[00:08:28] Excuse me,Mrs. Burkart? 柏卡特太太？
[00:08:30] Well,we're all cleaned up. 厨房都收拾好了
[00:08:33] Good. Thank you. 很好，谢谢你
[00:08:39] And,well,there's this small matter of the.... 还有一件小事…
[00:08:44] -Dear? -The matter of... 什么事？ 就是…
[00:08:47] ...payment. 费用的事
[00:08:49] Jack used to handle the finances. 钱都是杰克在管
[00:09:00] -You get it? -No,but I made a widow cry. 拿到了吗？ 没有，但是把未亡人惹哭了
[00:09:03] See you in hell. 我们会被打下十八层地狱
[00:09:12] You know what we should all do? 你知道吗？
[00:09:14] Go see a musical. 我们应该去看歌舞剧
[00:09:19] Sure. 好
[00:09:24] The 1996 Tony Award winner. 1996年东尼奖得奖作品
[00:09:28] I mean,that one's gotta be good. 那部戏一定赞
[00:09:34] I don't know. Grease? 不晓得，“火爆浪子”？
[00:09:38] 不是
[00:09:41] Rent? “吉屋出租”？
[00:09:43] Yes! Rent! 对！“吉屋出租”
[00:09:46] So when do you want to go? 好，什么时候去？
[00:09:47] What? I'm sorry. I can't,I'm busy. 什么？ 我不行，我很忙
[00:09:55] Man,it is so hard to shop for girls. 天哪，女孩子的礼物真难买
[00:10:00] Yes,it is... 的确很难…
[00:10:01] ...at Office Max! 文具店？
[00:10:05] What did you get her? 你买了什么？
[00:10:08] A pen. 一支笔
[00:10:10] It's two gifts in one. It's a pen that's also a clock. 这是二合一，是笔，也是时钟
[00:10:16] -You can't give her that. -Why not? 你不能送这个 为什么？
[00:10:19] She's not 11! 她不是小孩子
[00:10:22] And it's not the seventh night of Chanukah. 这也不是光明节结束前夕
[00:10:27] What he means by that is, while this is a very nice gift... 他的意思是，这个礼物虽然好
[00:10:31] ...maybe it's not something a boyfriend gives. 却不适合送给女朋友
[00:10:34] Sure it is. 当然适合
[00:10:36] She needs a pen for work. 她上班要用到笔
[00:10:37] She's writing. She turns it over. "It's time for my date with Joey!" 写到一半转过来一看 哇，该去跟乔伊约会了
[00:10:44] All right. What did you get for Angela Del Veccio's birthday? 好 你送安琪拉什么生日礼物？
[00:10:49] She didn't have one. 我们交往时没碰上生日
[00:10:51] For three years? 整整3年？
[00:10:55] Look,it's too late, and I got an audition. 已经来不及了，我还要试镜
[00:10:58] I can't shop anymore. 我不能再找了
[00:11:02] I will go out and try to find something for her. 我去帮你找，好吗？
[00:11:06] Thanks,man. 谢了
[00:11:07] While you're at it, could you get her a card? 你能不能顺便买张卡片？
[00:11:11] Would you like me to write her a little poem as well? 要不要我顺便写一首小诗？
[00:11:15] Or just get a card that has a poem already in it. 或是买张印了诗的卡片
[00:11:20] Oh,so it's a card, but it's also a poem-holder. 那是一张卡片，也是一页诗
[00:11:29] -You have to get our money. -She couldn't stop crying. 你得把钱要到 但是她哭个不停
[00:11:33] With those thick glasses, her tears look giant. 眼泪还被眼镜放大了
[00:11:37] I know,it's tough. 我知道很难
[00:11:38] You know what the first thing I did after my mom's funeral was? 你知道我妈一下葬我做了什么
[00:11:42] -What? -Pay the caterer! 什么？ 付钱给外烩厨师
[00:11:45] I've had a lot of jobs. 我做过很多工作
[00:11:46] And there are some people who always try to get out of paying. 有些人总是想赖帐
[00:11:51] It's either "That massage wasn't long enough"... 不是“按摩时间不够长”
[00:11:53] ...or "l don't know any of those songs"... 就是“我没听过这几首歌”
[00:11:56] ...or "These sombreros aren't big enough. Bad little white girl!" 或“这些墨西哥草帽不够大” “坏心眼的白妞”
[00:12:02] So you think she's faking? 你觉得她在装？
[00:12:05] There weren't any tears till you showed her the bill. 你拿出帐单前她根本没哭
[00:12:08] She sounded pretty upset to me. 她听起来很难过
[00:12:18] She seems fine now. 现在似乎没事了
[00:12:24] So you just left? Her place was really that bad? 所以你就走了？ 她家真的那么脏？
[00:12:28] You throw your jacket on a chair at the end of the day. 我们下班回家 会把外套扔到椅子上
[00:12:32] Like that,only instead of a chair, it's a pile of garbage. 在她家是扔到一堆垃圾上
[00:12:37] And instead of a jacket, it's a pile of garbage. 那也不是外套，而是一堆垃圾
[00:12:41] And instead of the end of the day, it's the end of time... 那也不是下班回家 而是世界末日
[00:12:45] ...and garbage is all that has survived. 只有垃圾存留下来
[00:12:50] -Here. -Wow. Thanks. 拿去 谢了
[00:12:53] So what happened? 然后呢？
[00:12:55] Nothing. I had to get out of there. 哪有然后，我逃之夭夭
[00:12:57] Next time,you take her to your place. 下次你就带她去你家
[00:13:00] I tried that. She says it has a weird smell. 我试过了，她说我家有怪味
[00:13:04] -What kind of smell? -I don't know. Soap? 什么怪味？ 不晓得，香皂味？
[00:13:08] -Listen,you like this girl,right? -Yeah. 听着，你喜欢她对吧？ 对
[00:13:11] -You want to see her again? -Yeah. 你想再跟她见面？ 对
[00:13:12] So you're going to have to do it in the mess! 那你就得在垃圾里跟她做
[00:13:16] Yeah,okay. You're right. 好吧，你说得对
[00:13:19] I mean,who cares about a little sloppiness? 稍微乱一点又怎样？
[00:13:25] -It's endearing,really. -All right! 其实蛮可爱的 很好
[00:13:27] Now you go get that beautiful pig! 去撂倒那只美丽的猪吧
[00:13:40] I just spent the entire afternoon looking for a present... 我花了一下午替凯西找一件
[00:13:44] ...for Kathy that would be better than the rabbit. 比这只兔子好的礼物
[00:13:47] Any luck? 有找到吗？
[00:13:48] Yeah,I found this great place called "lnvisible Things for Kathy." 有，我找到一家店 叫“送给凯西的隐形礼物”
[00:13:53] Can you give me a hand with all this stuff? 你能不能帮我搬一这些礼物？
[00:13:56] Just return the book, let Joey give her the clock pen... 你就把书退回去 让乔伊送她那支时钟笔
[00:14:00] ...and you get her something worse than that... 你送个更差的东西，例如…
[00:14:03] ...Iike a regular pen. 一支普通的笔
[00:14:05] She's really going to love this,you know? 她会很喜欢这本书
[00:14:09] The bottom line is, I want her to have it... 我希望她拥有这本书
[00:14:15] Honey,that's so sweet. 好感人喔
[00:14:18] You don't think it's just pathetic? 你不觉得很可悲吗？
[00:14:21] Oh,"pathetic"! 是“可悲”！
[00:14:26] I've been looking all over for you. 我要去见凯西了，我到处找你
[00:14:29] -Where? -Our place. The hall. 在哪里找？ 家里啦，大厅啦
[00:14:36] I got something for her. 我找到礼物了
[00:14:44] It's a book. 是一本书
[00:14:47] A book? 书？
[00:14:50] Is it a book that's also a safe? 是书也是保险盒？
[00:15:01] So just let me know if she likes it,okay? 让我知道她喜不喜欢，好吗？
[00:15:03] You got it. Thanks for doing this. I owe you one. 没问题 谢谢你，我欠你一次
[00:15:11] There wasn't any change from that twenty,was there? 那20块没有找钱是吧？
[00:15:15] No,it came out to an even twenty. 没有，刚好20块
[00:15:19] Wow. That's almost as much as a new book. 哇，跟新书差不多贵
[00:15:35] -You didn't get the money? -Maybe I can try at intermission? 还是没要到，对吧？ 等她暂停再去好了
[00:15:40] You know what? Let's just go. 我们就走吧
[00:15:43] We're not leaving till we get paid! 不行，钱没拿到不能走
[00:15:45] I don't know who she thinks she is. 她以为她是谁啊
[00:15:47] I talked to the florist. She didn't get paid either. 我问过，花店也没拿到钱
[00:15:50] Or the limo driver,or the priest,and he can get the dead guy damned for all eternity. 还有灵车司机和神父 但他可以咒那个死人不得超生
[00:15:57] Well,I'm not going back out there. 我不要再去了
[00:16:00] Fine. Enough is enough! 好，我受够了
[00:16:03] Hey,widow? 喂，未亡人
[00:16:06] Widow? 死老公的
[00:16:11] Thanks. Clearly this is a very,very hard time for you. 谢了 你现在当然十分难过
[00:16:16] But we provided a service, and we deserve to be paid... 但我们提供服务 就该领到费用
[00:16:19] ...because you ate that service. 因为你吃都吃了
[00:16:21] We are not leaving here until we are paid every penny,because... 钱没付清我们不会走
[00:16:26] ...we're part-time caterers and we have no place else to go. 因为我们是兼职的，不必赶场
[00:16:31] All right. I'll get my bag. 好，我去拿皮包
[00:16:34] Good. 很好
[00:16:43] I'm going to leave some cards here. 我留几张名片
[00:16:48] Please think of us for your next event. 下次有需要请考虑我们
[00:16:57] So you want to come inside? 你想进来吗？
[00:17:00] Yes. 想
[00:17:03] Yes,I do. 我想
[00:17:15] I'll be right back. Make yourself comfortable. 我马上回来，你随便坐
[00:17:42] Guess who? 猜猜我是谁？
[00:17:45] Department of Sanitation? 卫生稽查人员？
[00:17:49] It's me. 是我
[00:18:04] What? 怎么了？
[00:18:06] Oh,Cheryl! 喔！雪柔
[00:18:13] 天哪…
[00:18:30] -It's my hamster! It's Mitzi! -Oh,my God! 那是我的仓鼠，是蜜琪 天哪
[00:18:34] I'm so sorry. I must have freaked out. 对不起，我吓到了
[00:18:37] Thank God it's not Mitzi! 幸好不是蜜琪
[00:18:39] It's just a rat. 只是一只老鼠
[00:18:45] I did it! 完成了
[00:18:47] I finished it! I did it all by myself! 我填完了 我一个人把它填完了
[00:18:50] And there's nobody to hug. 却没有人可抱
[00:18:53] Move!
[00:19:01] Hey,you guys! 你们！
[00:19:03] I finished it all by myself! Hug me. 我一个人把字谜填完了，抱我
[00:19:06] 太棒了
[00:19:08] -Congratulations. -Thank you. 恭喜 谢谢
[00:19:10] How did it go? 外烩办得怎样？ 过瘾死了
[00:19:11] The widow wouldn't pay, so Phoebe yelled at her till she did. 那个寡妇不肯付钱 菲比就骂到她付钱为止
[00:19:15] I'm a hard-ass. 没错，我是狠角色
[00:19:19] And I'm a wuss. We should be partners. 而我是软脚虾 我们应该联手
[00:19:23] Hard-ass and wuss. We could fight crime. 是啊 狠角色和软脚虾打击犯罪
[00:19:28] Wait a minute,Phoebe. 等一下，菲比
[00:19:30] We should be partners. 我们是该联手
[00:19:32] We should be catering partners. 我们应该合伙办外烩
[00:19:34] You're not working now, and we have a great time together. 你想嘛，你现在没工作 我们又合作无间
[00:19:39] I cook and you take care of the money. 好 我下厨，你管钱
[00:19:42] It'll be like I have a wife in the 50s! 我就像娶了个很传统的老婆
[00:19:50] How did she like the gift? 怎样？她喜欢吗？
[00:19:52] She loved it. She's showing the girls right now. 她爱死了 她拿去隔壁给女生们看
[00:19:55] Yeah? That's great. 是吗？太好了
[00:19:57] I got to tell you... 老实说
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