[00:00:00] 本字幕由天琴实验室独家AI技术生成
[00:00:01] 花和尚
[00:00:02] 鲁智深
[00:00:05] 受至青长老所差
[00:00:09] 到酸枣门外去管理菜园子
[00:00:16] 通告这一发出
[00:00:19] 就激怒了那些泼皮和无赖
[00:00:25] 张三李四是两个头子
[00:00:28] 马上把哥们儿召集起来
[00:00:31] 开个碰头会
[00:00:35] 商量对付鲁智深的办法
[00:00:39] 一致同意要给花和尚来个下马威
[00:00:46] 让他害怕一辈子
[00:00:50] 那怎么办呢
[00:00:53] 张三李四啊
[00:00:55] 鬼点子挺多
[00:00:58] 说
[00:00:58] 这么办吧
[00:01:00] 咱就在那个粪坑的旁边
[00:01:04] 去见他
[00:01:06] 出其不意
[00:01:08] 攻其不备
[00:01:11] 嘴上给他说好话
[00:01:14] 然后冷不丁地抱住他
[00:01:17] 两条腿呼突
[00:01:20] 把他扔到粪坑里头
[00:01:23] 让他饱饱的喝顿粪汁儿
[00:01:28] 你说这招怎么样
[00:01:30] 好
[00:01:30] 太好了
[00:01:31] 就这么办
[00:01:35] 这帮人
[00:01:36] 记忆已定
[00:01:38] 还贪俩钱儿啊
[00:01:40] 买了四样果子
[00:01:43] 到了第二天
[00:01:46] 偷偷摸摸到了菜地
[00:01:49] 就来到粪坑的旁边
[00:01:54] 你想那菜地的粪坑
[00:01:58] 可不小啊
[00:02:00] 左边两个
[00:02:02] 右边两个
[00:02:03] 当中是一条人行道
[00:02:07] 人行道宽了下
[00:02:08] 也就是在三四尺
[00:02:12] 两旁的粪坑深不见底呀
[00:02:18] 这粪坑啊
[00:02:19] 离着鲁智深住那地方不超过50 步
[00:02:26] 再看这帮小子到了
[00:02:31] 带着俩人
[00:02:33] 拿着四彩的果子
[00:02:35] 在门前就喊
[00:02:39] 我说鲁师傅
[00:02:40] 在吗
[00:02:42] 鲁大师
[00:02:43] 在吗
[00:02:46] 鲁智深早起来了
[00:02:49] 梳洗已毕
[00:02:51] 把今天的事儿安排安排
[00:02:54] 正在屋里头胡思乱想呢
[00:02:58] 听外头一咋呼
[00:02:59] 鲁智深站起身来
[00:03:01] 探身往外观看
[00:03:03] 哎哟
[00:03:04] 嚯嚯
[00:03:05] 怎么来这么帮人呢
[00:03:08] 一瞅这帮人
[00:03:10] 歪带帽子
[00:03:11] 斜瞪眼闪
[00:03:13] 披着衣服
[00:03:14] 罗胳膊
[00:03:15] 挽袖子
[00:03:16] 就不像是好人
[00:03:20] 为首的有四个人儿
[00:03:23] 已经奔这边走来了
[00:03:25] 速度相当缓慢
[00:03:28] 后边那俩手里好像还拎着点心什么的
[00:03:34] 鲁智深不知道是怎么回事儿
[00:03:37] 迈大步就出来了
[00:03:39] 哦哦
[00:03:40] 阿弥陀佛
[00:03:44] 你们找我吗
[00:03:47] 您是新来的
[00:03:49] 鲁智深
[00:03:50] 鲁师傅吗
[00:03:52] 正是山家
[00:03:54] 哎呀
[00:03:55] 鲁师傅
[00:03:57] 我们都是本地的菜农啊
[00:04:01] 听说大师来了
[00:04:03] 我们非常高兴
[00:04:06] 弟兄们
[00:04:06] 凑了俩钱来看您来了
[00:04:11] 说着话
[00:04:12] 张三李四还有那俩人就站住不动了
[00:04:17] 鲁智深就往前走
[00:04:20] 就走到粪坑
[00:04:22] 中间这个过道上来了
[00:04:25] 呵
[00:04:26] 张三李四心花怒放心说
[00:04:29] 来吧
[00:04:31] 离你倒霉可不远了
[00:04:34] 说话间
[00:04:36] 就到了
[00:04:36] 近前了
[00:04:38] 张三李四赶紧一哈腰
[00:04:41] 单腿打圈
[00:04:43] 鲁师傅
[00:04:44] 一回生
[00:04:45] 两回熟啊
[00:04:47] 我姓张
[00:04:48] 叫张三
[00:04:49] 他叫李四
[00:04:51] 我叫过街鼠
[00:04:53] 他叫白眼狼
[00:04:55] 嘿
[00:04:56] 我们都是本地人呢
[00:04:58] 往后咱们就是邻居了
[00:05:01] 我们给大师傅行个礼吧
[00:05:03] 哦
[00:05:04] 免礼
[00:05:05] 免礼
[00:05:05] 不必客气
[00:05:07] 不必客气
[00:05:10] 可这俩小子行礼是假的
[00:05:13] 利用哈腰这机会诶
[00:05:17] 喷喷
[00:05:20] 一个抱住鲁智深的左腿
[00:05:23] 一个抱住鲁智深的右腿
[00:05:29] 按照他们的安排
[00:05:31] 一使劲把鲁智深就扔到粪坑里去了
[00:05:36] 可就在刹那之间
[00:05:39] 花和尚反应过来了
[00:05:41] 哎哟
[00:05:43] 明白了
[00:05:46] 在那老和尚做交接手续的时候
[00:05:50] 向我说的清清楚楚
[00:05:53] 本地
[00:05:54] 有一帮泼皮无赖
[00:05:57] 他们就吃这块菜地
[00:06:01] 历届管理菜园子的人那受老了
[00:06:06] 欺负了
[00:06:07] 惹不起他们
[00:06:08] 让我多加谨慎
[00:06:10] 瞧见没来了
[00:06:14] ****
[00:06:15] 你们错翻了眼皮了
[00:06:18] 叫你知道知道洒家的厉害
[00:06:23] 鲁智深想到这儿
[00:06:25] 把气往下一沉诶
[00:06:30] 这一招又叫拴马桩
[00:06:33] 又叫千斤坠
[00:06:36] 那两条大腿就好像长到地里似的
[00:06:42] 两个人抱住鲁智深的大腿
[00:06:45] 尽管使尽平生的力量
[00:06:49] 是纹丝不动
[00:06:51] 哎
[00:06:55] 鲁智深哈哈大笑
[00:06:58] 好小子
[00:06:59] 你们要干什么去
[00:07:02] 你娘的肉肉棒棒
[00:07:08] 把两条大腿左右一甩
[00:07:11] 张三李四的乐子大了
[00:07:13] 头朝下都掉进粪坑
[00:07:19] 没把旁人收拾了
[00:07:21] 收拾他们自己了
[00:07:24] 方才咱说了
[00:07:26] 这粪坑啊
[00:07:27] 深不见底呀
[00:07:30] 这俩人可倒了霉了
[00:07:32] 把大嘴一张
[00:07:33] 这路喝呀
[00:07:34] 诶
[00:07:35] 这回可有吃有喝
[00:07:38] 后边那些小子一瞅呀
[00:07:42] 见势不好
[00:07:43] 是转身就跑
[00:07:46] 鲁智深把腰一叉
[00:07:48] 高声断喝
[00:07:49] 听着
[00:07:50] 都给我站住
[00:07:54] 谁跑我逮回来就扔进粪坑
[00:07:58] 站住
[00:08:01] 这一嗓子好像打个霹雳
[00:08:04] 这帮家伙全站住了
[00:08:07] 呃
[00:08:08] 师傅饶命
[00:08:09] 师傅饶命
[00:08:10] 没有我们的事儿
[00:08:12] 你们都给我回来
[00:08:14] 去找杆子
[00:08:16] 把这俩****给我拽上来
[00:08:20] 鲁智深也怕把他们给呛死
[00:08:25] 刚来了没几天
[00:08:27] 在摊了人命官司
[00:08:29] 那不就麻烦了吗
[00:08:31] 诶是是是是是
[00:08:33] 这帮人找来长杆子捏着鼻子
[00:08:36] 堵着嘴
[00:08:38] 到了粪坑的边儿上
[00:08:40] 好不容易算把张三李四
[00:08:44] 给救上来了
[00:08:46] 这两个人也吃饱了
[00:08:48] 也喝足了
[00:08:49] 哇哇
[00:08:51] 这吐啊
[00:08:54] 鲁智深把鼻子也堵上了
[00:08:57] 吩咐他们
[00:08:58] 把这俩****抬到井旁
[00:09:01] 拿水给我冲
[00:09:05] 众人七手八脚把他们抬到井边
[00:09:09] 左一桶水
[00:09:10] 右一桶水
[00:09:11] 一直浇干净了
[00:09:14] 有的人把衣服脱下来
[00:09:16] 让他们换上
[00:09:18] 这俩小子把衣服换上了
[00:09:20] 脸都绿了啊
[00:09:23] 扑通
[00:09:26] 跪到鲁智深脚下
[00:09:29] 师傅饶命
[00:09:30] 师傅饶命啊
[00:09:36] 说
[00:09:38] 你们想干什么
[00:09:40] 诶我们说我们说
[00:09:43] 我们的确是本地的菜农
[00:09:47] 因为游手好闲惯了
[00:09:51] 怎么生活呢
[00:09:53] 就吃这块菜地
[00:09:56] 比方说
[00:09:57] 菜收成了
[00:09:59] 我们就上这儿来抢来
[00:10:01] 抢后就去卖
[00:10:04] 去卖下钱我们就买粮买米
[00:10:07] 任意挥霍
[00:10:10] 可历届的师傅也不愿意我们这么干
[00:10:14] 但是我们鬼点子多
[00:10:17] 他不答应
[00:10:19] 我们就想法收拾他
[00:10:21] 因此都收拾的老老实实的
[00:10:24] 听我们弟兄的
[00:10:26] 没想到您老人家来了
[00:10:29] 听那意思您挺厉害
[00:10:32] 大概不能听我们的
[00:10:35] 我们这才商议着给您来个下马威
[00:10:39] 没想到没收拾了您
[00:10:42] 把我们自己给收拾了
[00:10:44] 师傅饶命啊
[00:10:46] 下回我们老也不敢了
[00:10:48] 是啊是啊
[00:10:49] 我们再也不敢了
[00:10:54] 嗯
[00:10:56] 人生在世啊
[00:10:59] 应当找个正当的职业
[00:11:03] 像你们这些无赖
[00:11:05] 游手好闲
[00:11:08] 损阴丧德呀
[00:11:11] 你说你们缺德不缺德
[00:11:13] 我们太缺德了
[00:11:15] 缺德还冒烟
[00:11:18] 但愿你们说的是心里话
[00:11:22] 今天
[00:11:23] 咱们初次相见
[00:11:25] 我暂时饶过你们
[00:11:28] 下不为例
[00:11:30] 你们胆敢破坏菜园子
[00:11:33] 找筛家的毛病
[00:11:35] 我把你们脑袋拧下来
[00:11:38] 哎哟
[00:11:39] 是是是
[00:11:40] 再也不敢了
[00:11:41] 再也不敢了
[00:11:43] 滚滚诶诶滚
[00:11:45] 这就滚
[00:11:47] 神鬼怕恶人
[00:11:52] 您不服这个气儿
[00:11:54] 不行啊
[00:11:56] 书说简短
[00:11:57] 张三李四跑回去趴了好几天都没起来
[00:12:02] 等过了几天好了
[00:12:05] 又把这帮铁哥们找到一块儿了
[00:12:08] 大家一商议
[00:12:10] 不行
[00:12:11] 对付这个鲁智深啊
[00:12:13] 硬的行不通
[00:12:15] 干脆咱就来软的吧
[00:12:19] 万一呢
[00:12:20] 他睁一个眼合一个眼儿
[00:12:22] 赏给咱们一条出路
[00:12:24] 咱也不至于喝西北风啊
[00:12:27] 怎么来软的呢
[00:12:30] 大伙儿凑钱
[00:12:31] 买酒买肉来看望鲁智深
[00:12:36] 诶
[00:12:36] 这招果然好使了
[00:12:39] 鲁智深这个人呢
[00:12:41] 心肠软
[00:12:43] 就架不住这套
[00:12:44] 这帮人一来
[00:12:46] 一行鼻涕
[00:12:47] 两行眼泪
[00:12:49] 一个劲儿的道歉
[00:12:50] 一个劲儿说好的
[00:12:52] 鲁智深说算了算了算了算了
[00:12:55] 你们也不富裕
[00:12:57] 何必给我送东西呢
[00:13:00] 我也不能收
[00:13:01] 哎哟
[00:13:02] 师傅
[00:13:03] 你要不收
[00:13:04] 那你还是不原谅我们
[00:13:07] 我们再困难
[00:13:08] 买这点东西孝敬您还是可以的
[00:13:12] 如果师傅不嫌弃的话
[00:13:15] 我们愿意拜您老人家为师
[00:13:18] 您教给我们能耐吧
[00:13:20] 对拜您老人家为师
[00:13:23] 三四十号
[00:13:25] 跪了一片
[00:13:27] 给鲁智深磕头
[00:13:29] 鲁智深是海交啊
[00:13:33] 高兴
[00:13:35] 我说你们这可是真心的
[00:13:38] 我们要说瞎话
[00:13:40] 车轧马踩
[00:13:42] 不得善终好了
[00:13:45] 收下了
[00:13:46] 徒儿们免礼平身
[00:13:49] 多谢师傅
[00:13:53] 鲁智深一想
[00:13:56] 我在这看这菜地
[00:13:58] 多无聊啊
[00:14:00] 你是一天无所事事
[00:14:03] 不如收帮徒弟
[00:14:05] 教给他们点拳脚
[00:14:08] 今后呢
[00:14:09] 让这帮人也走上正路
[00:14:12] 省着去欺负别人去
[00:14:15] 鲁智深想的还真不错
[00:14:17] 打这之后
[00:14:19] 这帮人吃完饭按点儿来
[00:14:23] 鲁智深就在院里头
[00:14:26] 让他们蹲小架子
[00:14:29] 练拳
[00:14:30] 练脚
[00:14:32] 开始练功
[00:14:34] 其实这帮人啊
[00:14:36] 都有点儿基础
[00:14:38] 一教就会
[00:14:41] 因此
[00:14:42] 这帮人对鲁智深也非常尊敬
[00:14:45] 鲁智深对他们也挺喜欢
[00:14:48] 越来越亲近
[00:14:50] 是越来越亲近
[00:14:53] 这片菜地
[00:14:55] 没人破坏了
[00:14:57] 张三李四带着头儿
[00:15:00] 还帮着那些劳动僧收拾菜地
[00:15:04] 每一天保证给大相国寺送20 担新鲜蔬菜
[00:15:11] 呀
[00:15:13] 智清长老一看
[00:15:15] 行
[00:15:15] 诶
[00:15:17] 不管什么人管理
[00:15:19] 从来没像过这样
[00:15:22] 你看看
[00:15:23] 这菜又好
[00:15:25] 送的又及时
[00:15:27] 保证供应嘛
[00:15:29] 他怎么不及时呢
[00:15:31] 庙上的人
[00:15:32] 上上下下
[00:15:34] 皆大欢喜
[00:15:37] 鲁智深就开始在这定居了
[00:15:40] 每天交给这帮人武艺
[00:15:45] 光阴似箭
[00:15:46] 是日月如梭
[00:15:49] 转眼到了第二年的三月
[00:15:54] 和东京这地方
[00:15:56] 三月
[00:15:57] 天气就挺热的了
[00:16:00] 鲁智深一想
[00:16:02] 净让他们请我了
[00:16:05] 我没请过他们
[00:16:06] 这回我也破费破费
[00:16:10] 把这半年来的积蓄
[00:16:12] 他全拿出来了
[00:16:14] 告诉张三李四去
[00:16:17] 上街采买去
[00:16:18] 为师要请你们吃饭
[00:16:21] 哎哟
[00:16:22] 师傅
[00:16:23] 这哪行啊
[00:16:25] 只有徒弟请老师的
[00:16:28] 哪有师傅请徒弟的
[00:16:30] 不不不不不
[00:16:31] 礼尚往来嘛
[00:16:34] 我是一定要请你们
[00:16:36] 越丰盛越好
[00:16:40] 这几十两银子
[00:16:41] 可买老了东西了
[00:16:45] 好牛肉
[00:16:46] 好羊肉
[00:16:48] 好狗肉
[00:16:50] 鸡
[00:16:50] 鹅
[00:16:51] 鸭
[00:16:52] 买了无数
[00:16:54] 这帮人齐下手啊
[00:16:57] 鲁智深在这儿指挥着
[00:17:00] 忙活了一大半天
[00:17:02] 把东西全准备好了
[00:17:05] 这才叫烧鸡
[00:17:07] 扒鸭子
[00:17:08] 炖狗肉
[00:17:09] 炖牛肉
[00:17:10] 炖羊肉
[00:17:12] 又买了几十坛子好酒
[00:17:15] 就在这院儿里放上席子
[00:17:17] 众人是席地而坐
[00:17:20] 开怀畅饮
[00:17:23] 鲁智深说的好
[00:17:24] 今天是一醉方休
[00:17:27] 谢谢师傅
[00:17:29] 谢谢老师
[00:17:32] 轮流霸占
[00:17:34] 可在这个席前呢
[00:17:37] 他们一边吃一边说
[00:17:40] 说什么呢
[00:17:41] 鲁智深
[00:17:42] 给他们讲江湖绿林道的规矩
[00:17:46] 武术之精华
[00:17:49] 这帮人呢
[00:17:50] 抻着脖子静静地听着
[00:17:53] 听的是津津有味
[00:17:55] 鲁智深讲的
[00:17:57] 两嘴丫子冒白沫
[00:18:00] 正讲到传神之时
[00:18:04] 就这后院那老鸹
[00:18:07] 呱呱呱呱
[00:18:11] 叫起来
[00:18:12] 没完
[00:18:13] 鲁智深一皱眉
[00:18:15] 真他娘的扫兴
[00:18:18] 哪来的这么些乌鸦
[00:18:21] 张三李四说了
[00:18:23] 师傅您等等
[00:18:24] 就那棵树上
[00:18:26] 他也不怎么的
[00:18:28] 专招这些乌鸦
[00:18:30] 我们去把窝给他捅了
[00:18:32] 有的说
[00:18:33] 别去
[00:18:35] 干脆拿烟熏
[00:18:37] 有的时候把那树锯倒了就得了呗
[00:18:40] 要这么多树有什么用
[00:18:42] 鲁智深说
[00:18:43] 我看看
[00:18:45] 众人跟着出了角门
[00:18:48] 转到房后
[00:18:50] 房后啊
[00:18:51] 是一条小河
[00:18:53] 河边上就这棵柳树
[00:18:58] 这柳树上边能有十几个老鸹窝
[00:19:03] 这老鸹就是乌鸦
[00:19:07] 鲁智深叉着腰
[00:19:09] 抬头看看
[00:19:10] 哎呀
[00:19:12] 甚至有时候晚上连觉都睡不好
[00:19:16] 就这些乌鸦
[00:19:17] 太捣蛋了
[00:19:19] 众人这又找梯子找竿子
[00:19:21] 有的去要求锯
[00:19:24] 都叫鲁智深给拦住了
[00:19:25] 不必
[00:19:27] 干脆把这棵柳树连根拔了就得了
[00:19:33] 师傅
[00:19:35] 您真说笑话你
[00:19:37] 您瞅这棵树有多粗
[00:19:40] 树大的根深呢
[00:19:43] 那还有个拔嘛
[00:19:45] 你们认为我说瞎话吗
[00:19:49] 那倒没敢那么想
[00:19:51] 不过这玩意谁也拔不下来看我的
[00:19:57] 鲁智深把外边的僧衣捆掉
[00:20:00] 把大袋紧了几扣
[00:20:03] 围这棵柳树转了那么几圈
[00:20:05] 然后往下一下腰
[00:20:09] 倒着把这棵树给抱住了
[00:20:13] 鲁智深舌尖一顶上牙膛一叫
[00:20:16] 丹田一力混元气呀
[00:20:19] 先往两旁晃动几下
[00:20:23] 跟那个拔牙差不多少
[00:20:26] 拔牙呢
[00:20:27] 也得诶诶晃那么几下
[00:20:30] 嘭给拔起来
[00:20:32] 他拔这棵柳树也采取这个办法
[00:20:35] 那鲁智深两臂一晃
[00:20:38] 千斤之力
[00:20:40] 哎哟哎哟哎呀哎
[00:20:43] 切咔吱
[00:20:49] 张三李四瞪眼看着
[00:20:52] 就见土地破裂
[00:20:54] 大树是连根而起
[00:20:57] 愣叫鲁智深给扒下来
[00:21:03] 这就是水浒传中最精彩的一段
[00:21:06] 鲁智深倒拔垂杨柳
[00:21:11] 一举成名啊
[00:21:14] 等树拔下来
[00:21:16] 扑通倒到旁边
[00:21:17] 老龟也跑了
[00:21:20] 这三四十个徒弟
[00:21:22] 能有五分钟
[00:21:24] 谁也没说话
[00:21:27] 什么原因
[00:21:28] 都惊呆了
[00:21:30] 一个个好像木雕泥树一般
[00:21:33] 张着大嘴
[00:21:35] 瞪着眼睛
[00:21:35] 连气都喘不出来了
[00:21:39] 等他们明白过来
[00:21:41] 哎呀
[00:21:41] 师傅
[00:21:42] 神人也
[00:21:44] 我老师是神人
[00:21:46] 下界呼啦朝全跪下了
[00:21:50] 鲁智深是哈哈大笑
[00:21:52] 哈哈哈哈
[00:21:56] 这回你们相信了吧
[00:21:58] 我们太服了
[00:22:00] 师傅
[00:22:01] 您不是一般的人
[00:22:03] 您是上界的金刚
[00:22:06] 您是活佛
[00:22:10] 这个消息是不胫而走
[00:22:14] 老百姓都知道了
[00:22:17] 打这之后
[00:22:19] 谁也不敢上这儿
404
404，您请求的文件不存在!