Ross,she wants you. 告诉你吧,罗斯,她要你 We just live in the same building. 我们只是住在同一栋公寓 -Any contact? -She lent me an egg. -有过任何接触? -她借过我一颗蛋 -You're in! -Right. -有机会了 -真的 Hey,Ross. 嗨,罗斯 Come on. Get back in the game. 拜托,你得再接再厉 The Rachel thing isn't happening, your ex-wife's a lesbian.... 你和瑞秋的事没指望 你前妻是个女同志 I don't think we need a third. 我们不想有第三回 Could we get an egg, still in the shell? 抱歉,能给我们个蛋吗?整颗蛋? An egg? 蛋? I think it's winning. 我们赢定了 -Thank you. -Thank you. Here. -谢谢 -谢谢,给 Go with the egg,my friend. 朋友,带着蛋去 Go,go,go! 快去 -Think it'll work? -No way. It's suicide. -你想会成功吗? -才怪,这简直是自杀.带蛋的男人 The One With The Candy Hearts 六人行 第1季 第14集 情人节糖果 -You can't do this. -Do what? -你不能这样做 -做什么? -Roger wants to take her out. -No! Remember why you dumped him? -罗杰明天要带她出去 -不,菲比难道你忘了为何抛弃他? Because he was creepy. 因为他惹人厌 And mean. And frightening. 卑鄙又可怖 Still,it's nice to have a date on Valentine's Day! 但情人节有人共渡也不差 You can go out with a creep any night. 其他任何一夜跟他约会都无所谓 I know I do. 我知道我会这么做 -What are you doing tomorrow night? -That depends on how tonight goes. -你们明晚有何节目? -明天有何节目全看今天的表现 -About tonight -Don't you bail on me! -关于今晚 -你不能背叛我 -But her friend sounds like a -Pathetic mess. I know,but.... -我知道,但她朋友好像是个… -可怜虫,我知道 Come on. She's needy,vulnerable. 但她是如此渴望如此脆弱 I'm thinking.... 我想. Thanks. 谢谢 You haven't been out with a woman since Janice. You're doing this. 你和珍妮丝之后就没约过会 你一定要去 -She said yes. -Way to go,man! -她答应了 -干得好 Still got the egg,huh? -蛋还在?. -对 How do I look? 我的样子如何? I don't care. 不关我的事 There's Lorraine. 萝拉妮来了 No trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess. 切记,不准交换 你有美女相伴,我有贱货作陪 Hi,Joey. 乔依 Well,well! Look what you brought! 瞧你带什么人来 Very nice. 真帅 And what did you bring? 你带谁来? She's checking her coat. 她在放外套 I'm gonna wash the cab smell off of my hands. 我去洗掉手上的出租车味 Get me a white zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice. 你帮我和珍妮丝点萄葡酒和红酒 Janice? 珍妮丝… Janice!? 珍妮丝… Oh... 哦… ... my... … 我的… ...God! …天哪! Hey,it's Janice! 是珍妮丝 Okay,I'm making a break for it! 我得逃了,我要从窗子爬出去 I've been waiting for,like,forever to go out with Lorraine. 我一直梦想与萝拉妮约会 -Just calm down. -Calm down? -冷静点.. -冷静? You set me up with a woman I've dumped twice in the last five months! 你竟撮合我与在五个月内 被我甩掉两次的女人 Can you stop yelling? You're making me nervous and.... 别这么大声行吗?你害我紧张得… I can't go when I'm nervous. 我一紧张就尿不出来 I'm sorry,you're right. 抱歉,你说得对 Come on! Do it,do it! 拜托!快点 Roger was creepy,but he was nothing compared to Pete. 罗杰虽讨人厌 但与彼得卡尼相较还差得远呢 -Who? -Pete the Weeper. -谁? -爱哭鬼彼德 The guy that used to cry every time we had sex? 我们每次做爱他就哭 "Was it good for you?" 你满足吗? "I win! I win!" “我赢!我赢!” We went out for two months. I didn't win once. 我和他约会两个月一次都没赢过 How do we end up with these jerks? 我们怎会和这些浑蛋在一起? We're some kind of magnets. 我们可是良家妇女 I know I am. That's why I can't wear a digital watch. 我知道我有 所以我不能戴电子表 There's more beer,right? 还有啤酒? You know my friend who shaves her head? 记得我那剃光头的朋友艾比? No. No. 不 I have this friend who shaves her head. 我那剃光头的朋友 She says to break the bad boyfriend cycle... 她说想要停止与恶男交往的恶性循环 ...you can do a cleansing ritual. 可以举行一个清理仪式 Pheebs,this woman is voluntarily bald. 菲比,她是个大秃头 Yeah. 是的 We can do it tomorrow night. 我们明晚可以试试看 It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect. 明天情人节是绝佳的时刻 Okay,what kind of ritual? 什么仪式? We can burn the stuff they gave us. 我们可以烧掉他们送的东西 Or...? 或者是? Or we can chant and dance around naked with sticks. 或是念经,拿着权杖裸体跳舞 Burning's good. 还是烧东西好 You know... 知道吗 ... I can pick up quarters with my toes. 我从儿时就能用脚趾夹起25美分 Yeah? Good for you. 是吗?真厉害 Quarters or rolls of quarters? 硬币还是纸币? By the way,I cut you out of all of my pictures. 对了,钱德我把照片上的你都剪掉了 That's okay. 不用了 You could make little puppets out of them. 你可以用它们做傀儡 And you could use them in your Theater of Cruelty! 也可以在你的“残酷戏院”中用它们! -We can't do that! -What? What can't you do? -不能这么做 -什么?不能做什么? Can I talk to you for a second? Over there? 能过去和你谈谈吗? We might be leaving now. 我们得先离开 Tell me it's you and me "we." 告诉我“我们”是指你和我 She wants to slather my body with stuff and lick it off. 她说她要在我身上涂满东西 然后舔乾净 I'm not even sure what slathering is! 我甚至不知道涂是什么意思 But I definitely want to be a part of it! 但我绝对不想错过任何部分! Okay,you cannot do this to me. 你不能这样待我 You're right. I'm sorry. 你说得对,抱歉 Can we have three chocolate mousses to go? 三份巧克力慕斯外带 I'm out of here. 我走了 Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. 这是我的信用卡,这一顿算我的 I hope she throws up on you. 我希望把她扔在你身上 Thanks. 谢谢 -So.... -Just us. 只剩下我们 What a crappy night! 真是糟糕的一夜 I have enjoyed the fact... 但我还是一直欣赏 ...that your shirt's been sticking out of your zipper. 你拉链里的衣服 Excuse me. 抱歉 How you doing? 近来可好? So do we have the best friends, or what? 他们是我们最要好的朋友? Joey's not a friend. He's... 乔伊哪儿称得上是朋友,他… ...a stupid man who left us his credit card. 他这留下信用卡的笨蛋 Another drink? Dessert? A big-screen TV? 想再来一杯?甜点?大银幕电视? -I'll have a drink. -Got it. Good woman! -我想再来一杯 -没问题,好女人 -A bottle of overpriced champagne. -Each. -拿瓶最贵的香槟来 -每人一瓶 That's right,each. And a rob roy. 对,再每人各一瓶罗伯罗伊 I've always wanted to know. 我老早就想品尝了 Happy Valentine's Day! 情人节快乐 Oh,I miss you already. 我现在就开始想念你了 -Can you believe this happened? -No,no! -你能相信会发生这种事吗? -不能 And yet it did. 但还是发生了 -Goodbye,Janice. -kiss me! -再见,珍妮丝 -吻我 Oh,Chandler. Sorry. 钱德,抱歉 Oh,Chandler. Sorry! 钱德,抱歉 -Hey,Janice. -Hi,Monica. -珍妮丝 -摩尼卡 Well,this was very special. 真是太特别了 Rach,come see who's out here! 瑞秋,看谁来了 What's going on? Oh,my God! 怎么了?天啊 Janice! Hi! 珍妮丝!Hi! Janice is gonna go away now! 她就要走了 I'll be right back. 我马上回来 Joey! Look who it is! 乔伊,看谁来了 Good. Joey's home. 很好,乔伊回来了 This is so much fun! 这真是太好玩了 This is like a reunion in the hall! 好像是大团圆一样 Ross,there's someone I want you to say hi to. 罗斯,对,跟某人打个招呼吧 He happened to call. 他恰好打电话来 Hi,Ross. That's right,it's me! How did you know? 罗斯,对,是我.你怎么会知道? So,if dogs experience jet lag... 我是说会如果狗也有时差问题 ... because of the seven dog years to one human year thing... 因为狗的七年等于人的一年 ...when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles... 那么狗从纽约飞到洛杉矶 ... he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses a week and a half. 损失的不是三小时,而是十天 That's funny! 真好笑 They should be cooking the food soon. 他们应该马上就做饭了 Oh,good. oh,好的 Who are they? 她们是谁? The blond is my ex-wife. The woman touching her is her... 金发的是我前妻,碰她的是她的 ...close,personal friend. 密友 -They're lovers? -lf you want to put a label on it. -你是指她们是情人? -如果你硬要这么说的话 -Anything else I should know? -Nope. That's it. -我还需要知道什么? -不,就这些了 Oh,and she's pregnant with my baby. 对了,她怀了我的孩子 I always forget that part. 我总是忘了这件事 Hello! Hello! Now we need sage branches and the sacramental wine. 我们需要鼠尾草和沙加缅度酒 All I had is oregano and a Fresca. 我只有牛至叶和佛瑞斯加 That's okay! 那样也行 Now we need the semen of a righteous man. 现在我们需要正义男子的精液 If we had that,we wouldn't be doing the ritual in the first place. 菲比,如果我们有 现在就无需进行仪式了 -Can we start throwing things in? -Yeah,okay! -可以丢东西了吗? -可以了 Okay. Barry's letters. 巴瑞的信 Adam Ritter's boxer shorts. 亚当瑞塔的四角裤 -A picture of Scotty Jared naked! -Let me see! -这是史考帝的裸体照片 -让我看看! -He's wearing a sweater. -No. -他穿着毛衣 -没有 -Whose MCl card is that? -Mine. Shoot! -这是谁的MCl卡? -我的.咻! Remember this number: Nine,seven,four.... 赶紧记住号码:9,7,4…. Okay,and here we have the last of Paolo's grappa. 最后这是保罗的格拉巴酒 Wait,isn't it almost pure 等等,这不是几乎纯… How can I dump this woman on Valentine's Day? 我怎能在情人节甩掉她 I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's. 天晓得,但你在新年甩掉她 In my next life, I'm coming back as a toilet brush. 下辈子我要当马桶刷 Hello,funny valentine! 有趣的情人 Hi,just Janice. 珍妮丝 Hello,Joey,our little matchmaker. 乔伊,我们的小媒婆 I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna. 我忍不住想吻你 If you don't do it,I will. 如果你不敢,就让我来开口 -So are you actually from New York? -Not originally. I'm from -你真的从纽约来的? -本来不是,我从 -You said they'd shoot it without you. -I thought they could. -你说他们可以自己做 -我以为他们可以 The maxi-pads were a piece of cake. Mini-pads should be that much easier. 最大版都是小菜一碟 最小版当然是更简单一些了啊 -It's Valentine's Day. -I know,but it's my job. -但现在是情人节 我知道,但这是我的工作 I'll try to get back as soon as I can. 我会尽量赶回来,抱歉 I'm spending most of my time teaching science... 但我大部分时间都在教科学 ...which is funny because that wasn't even my major. 真好笑,我又不是主修科学 Now,that is funny! 真好笑 Do you think it would be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 我邀卡萝过来会很奇怪吗? Because she's alone now. And pregnant. And sad. 因为她现在一个人,怀孕了,心情又不好 -I guess. -Are you sure? Carol! -大概吧 -你确定?卡萝! -Wanna join us? -No,I'm fine. -愿意过来坐吗? -不,我没事 Come on. These people will scooch down. 来吧,这些人会挪过去的 You guys will scooch,won't you? Let's try scooching! Come on! 你们会挪过去的,对吧? 各位挪过去好吗,动起来 -Come on. -Thank you. -拜托 -谢谢 IKristen Riggs,this is Carol Willick. Carol,Kristen. 克莉丝汀,这位是卡萝 卡萝,克莉丝汀 -How do you do? -Carol teaches sixth grade. -你好 -卡萝教六年级 And Kristen.... 克莉丝汀… IKristen does something... 克莉丝汀… ...that,funnily enough... 最好笑的是 ...wasn't even her major! 是她的工作不是她的主修 -Thanks for coming over. -Not at all. It's pretty much our job. -谢谢你们能来 -没关系.这是我们的工作 That's why we get the cool hats. 这就是我们为什么戴这么酷的帽子啊 -What do we got there? -A piece of sik boxer shorts. -里面有什么东西? 一些真丝四角内裤 A half-charred picture of.... 烧焦的照片 That guy's hairier than the chief! 这家伙的体毛比队长的还浓密 It's a really funny story how this happened. 这件事说来好笑 I was taking out the trash, and Phoebe was burning incense 我拿出垃圾桶,菲比点燃熏香 It's all right. 没关系.你们不用解释 This isn't the first boyfriend bonfire we've seen get out of control. 这不是第一件烧毁男友物品失控的事件了 -Third one tonight. -Really? -这已是今晚的第三件 -真的? Valentine's is our busiest night of the year. 情人节之夜是我们最忙的时刻 Next time you're burning your ex-boyfriend's stuff: 下一次烧你们前男友的东西时: One,do it in a well-ventilated area. 第一,在一个通风好的地方 Two,if you wanna burn his clothing, stay away from synthetic fabrics. 第二,如果你们要烧衣服,小心合成纤维的 Three,try to let go of the anger, and learn to love yourself. 第三,试着放掉你们的怒气 学会爱护自己啊 -I brought you something. -ls it loaded? -我带了东西给你 -装上子弹了没? Oh,little candy hearts. "Chan and Jan Forever." 心型糖果“钱德与珍尼丝,永远” I had them made special. 我订做的 Okay,Janice. ok,珍妮丝… Hey,Janice. 嗨,珍妮丝… There's no way to tell you this. 我不该告诉你 At least,there's no new way. 至少没有别的方法来告诉你 That's fine. 无所谓 It is? It is? 是吗? Because I know that this isn't the end. 因为我知道我们还没结束 You see,actually,it is. 事实上已经结束了 No,because you won't let that happen. 不,还没因为你不会让它发生的 Don't you know it yet? 难道你还不懂? You love me,Chandler Bing! 你爱我,钱德.宾 Oh,no,I don't. 不,我不爱 Why do we keep ending up together? New Year's,who invited who? 那么就扪心自问,我们为何总是会复合? 新年是谁邀谁? -Valentine's,who asked who into bed? -I did,but -情人节是谁邀谁上床? -是我,可是… You seek me out! 我是你寻找的对象 Something deep in your soul calls out to me like a foghorn! 你的内心深处不断呼喊着我 Janice! Janice! 珍妮丝…珍妮丝… You push me away, you pull me back! 你推开我,你拉回我! You want me. You need me. 你要我,你需要我 You can't live without me. And you know it. 你不能没有我.你知道 You just don't know you know it. 你只是不知道你知道罢了 See? 明白吗? Call me! 打电话给我 It's not true. I never called your mother a wolverine. 这不是真的.我没说你妈是狼人 You did so,I swear to 你有,我发誓 How long has she been in the bathroom? 她上洗手间多久了? She isn't in the bathroom. Her coat's gone. 我想她不是去上洗手间,她的外套不见了 Well,maybe it's cold in there. 或许是太冷吧 I screwed up my first date in nine years. 或许我搞砸了九年来的第一次约会 -That could be it. -Oh,God. -有可能 -天哪 You know,this is still pretty hot. 知道吗,这里还是很热 Mushroom. 磨菇 Smile. 微笑 They won't all be like this. Some might stay through dinner. 不会每次都这样的 还是有些女人会把晚餐吃完的 -I'm sorry. That's not funny. -It's just.... -抱歉,不好笑 -只是 You know the whole "get on with your life" thing? 人们老说要继续你的人生 Well,do I have to? 我必须吗? I'm sitting here with this cute woman... 我和这位美女坐在这儿 ...and she's perfectly nice,but that... 她是那么好 ...that's it. 但就这么吹了 Then I'm here talking to you, and it's easy and it's fun. 我现在又和你聊天,轻松又自在 And I don't have to.... 我何必… -I know. -You know? -我懂 -你懂? Here's a wacky thought. 我有个疯狂的念头 Let's say you and I give it another shot. 我们再试一次好吗? I know what you're gonna say. You're a lesbian. 我知道你要说你是个女同志 404

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