[00:00:11] Step right up step right up step right up
[00:00:17] Everyones a winner bargains galore
[00:00:20] Thats right you too can be the proud owner
[00:00:23] Of the quality goes in before the name goes on
[00:00:28] One-tenth of a dollar one-tenth of a dollar we got service after sales
[00:00:34] You need perfume we got perfume how bout an engagement ring
[00:00:38] Something for the little lady something for the little lady
[00:00:40] Something for the little lady hmm
[00:00:42] Three for a dollar
[00:00:43] We got a year-end clearance we got a white sale
[00:00:46] And a smoke-damaged furniture you can drive it away today
[00:00:51] Act now act now and receive as our gift our gift to you
[00:00:56] They come in all colors one size fits all
[00:01:00] No muss no fuss no spills youre tired of kitchen drudgery
[00:01:03] Everything must go going out of business going out of business
[00:01:06] Going out of business sale
[00:01:08] Fifty percent off original retail price skip the middle man
[00:01:13] Dont settle for less
[00:01:14] How do we do it how do we do it volume volume turn up the volume
[00:01:19] Now youve heard it advertised dont hesitate
[00:01:23] Dont be caught with your drawers down
[00:01:25] Dont be caught with your drawers down
[00:01:27] You can step right up step right up
[00:01:30] Thats right it filets it chops it dices slices
[00:01:32] Never stops lasts a lifetime mows your lawn
[00:01:36] And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school
[00:01:38] It gets rid of unwanted facial hair it gets rid of embarrassing age spots
[00:01:41] It delivers a pizza and it lengthens and it strengthens
[00:01:46] And it finds that slipper thats been at large
[00:01:48] Under the chaise lounge for several weeks
[00:01:51] And it plays a mean rhythm master
[00:01:53] It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar
[00:01:56] And its only a dollar step right up its only a dollar step right up
[00:02:02] Cause it forges your signature
[00:02:04] If not completely satisfied mail back unused portion of product
[00:02:08] For complete refund of price of purchase
[00:02:10] Step right up
[00:02:12] Please allow thirty days for delivery dont be fooled by cheap imitations
[00:02:15] You can live in it live in it laugh in it love in it
[00:02:19] Swim in it sleep in it
[00:02:20] Live in it swim in it laugh in it love in it
[00:02:22] Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets thats right
[00:02:25] And it entertains visiting relatives it turns a sandwich into a banquet
[00:02:31] Tired of being the life of the party
[00:02:33] Change your shorts change your life change your life
[00:02:36] Change into a nine-year-old hindu boy get rid of your wife
[00:02:40] And it walks your dog and it doubles on sax
[00:02:43] Doubles on sax you can jump back jack see you later alligator
[00:02:46] See you later alligator
[00:02:47] And it steals your car
[00:02:49] It gets rid of your gambling debts it quits smoking
[00:02:51] Its a friend and its a companion
[00:02:52] And its the only product you will ever need
[00:02:55] Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing
[00:02:58] Well it takes weights off hips bust thighs chin midriff
[00:03:02] Gives you dandruff and it finds you a job it is a job
[00:03:07] And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange
[00:03:11] And it gives you denture breath
[00:03:15] And you know its a friend and its a companion
[00:03:18] And it gets rid of your travelers checks
[00:03:21] Its new its improved its old-fashioned
[00:03:22] Well it takes care of business never needs winding
[00:03:26] Never needs winding never needs winding
[00:03:28] Gets rid of blackheads the heartbreak of psoriasis
[00:03:30] Christ you dont know the meaning of heartbreak buddy
[00:03:33] Cmon cmon cmon cmon
[00:03:37] Cause its effective its defective it creates household odors
[00:03:41] It disinfects it sanitizes for your protection
[00:03:45] It gives you an erection it wins the election
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