Unbelievable! It's been half an hour. 真是令人难以置信,已过了半个小时 If this was a cartoon, you'd look like a ham now. 如果这是卡通 你应该看起来像火腿一样 -There's the waitress. Hello,miss! -It's Phoebe! -女侍在那儿,抱歉,小姐…等等 -是菲比! -Okay,will that be all? -Wait. What are you doing here? -好的,这些就是全部啦? -等等,你来这儿干什么? I was over there. Then you said, "Hello,miss." So I'm here. 我本来在那儿,然后你叫 “嗨,小姐.”所以我就过来了 No,how come you're working here? 不,你怎么会在这儿工作? Because it's close to where I live, and the aprons are cute. 因为这儿离我的住处很近 而且围裙也很漂亮 -Can we start over? -Okay,I'm gonna be over here. -可以重来吗? -好的,我到那边去 The One With Two Parts - Part l 六人行 第1季 第16集 第17集 双胞胎两部曲 I don't know whether he's testing me... 我不知道它是不是在考验我 ... but my monkey is out of control! 我的猴子已失去控制 He keeps erasing the messages on my machine. 它不断清除我答录机上的留言 Supposedly by accident. 应该是个意外 Oh,yeah,I've done that. 哦,是的,我做过这种事 And then he got to the newspaper before I did... 它连续三天在我看报纸前 ...and peed all over the crossword! 在猜字游戏上尿尿 I've never done that. 这我没做过 Last night,I don't know what he did but there were capers everywhere! 昨晚,我不知道他做了什么 他到处蹦来蹦去! -She looks exactly like her sister. -I'm saying I see a difference. -她看起来和她姐姐完全一样 -我看到不同之处 They're twins. 她们是双胞胎 I don't care. Phoebe's Phoebe. Ursula's hot! 我不管,菲比是菲比,乌苏拉很火辣 You know how we talk about things? 你知道我们怎么说这种事情? -Let's not do that anymore. -All right. -别再谈论那事了 -好吧 -Pheebs,guess who we saw today? -Oh,fun! Okay. -菲比,猜我们今天遇见谁? -哦,好玩的事情!好的 -Liam Neeson. -No. -连恩尼逊 -不是 -Morley Safer. -No. -茉莉.塞弗 -不是 -The lady who cuts my hair! -This could be a very long game. -剪我头发的女人! -这会是一个很长的游戏 -Your sister,Ursula. -Oh,really? -你姐姐,乌苏拉 -哦,真的? -She works at that place.... -Riff's. I know. -她在那儿工作… -瑞菲餐厅,我知道 You do? She said you guys haven't talked in years. 你知道?因为她说你们已多年不说话 So,is she fat? 对,她胖吗? Not from where I was standing. 从我的角度看不会 Where were you standing? 你从什么角度? Pheebs,so you guys just don't get along? 菲比,你们合不来? Everyone always thought of her as the pretty one. 大家都认为她漂亮 She was the first to walk even though I did it later that same day. 她先学会走路 虽然我是在当天稍后学会的 But to my parents,by then it was, "Yeah,what else is new?" 对我爸妈而言那,就已经不新鲜了 And I've got earth science, but I'll catch you in gym? 我得去参加地球科学班 健身房见了 -ls this just gonna be you and Carol? -Susan will be there too. -就你和卡萝两人去? -不,苏珊也要去 We've got dads,we've got lesbians. The whole parenting team. 那有爸爸,女同志…全部的父母都会到 -lsn't that gonna be weird? -lt might have been at first... -这样不是会很奇怪? -不会的,一开始或许会 ... but now I'm comfortable with it. 现在我已坦然面对 -Ross,that's my jacket. -I know. -罗斯,那是我的外套 -我知道 Hi. We're the Rostens. I'm J. C. and he's Michael. 我们姓罗,我是洁西他叫麦可 And we're having a boy and a girl. 我们有一个男孩和一个女孩 Good for you. All right,next? 厉害,下一位 I'm Ross Geller. And that's my boy in there. 我叫罗斯,我儿子在那儿 And this is Carol Willick. And this is Susan Bunch. 她叫卡罗,这位是苏珊 Susan is Carol's.... 苏珊是卡罗的… Who's next? 下一位是谁? Sorry,Susan is...? 抱歉,苏珊是… -Carol's friend. -Life partner. -苏珊是卡萝的朋友 -生活拍档 Like buddies. 就像伙伴 -Like lovers. -You know how close women can get. -好像恋人 -你知道女人能有多亲近的 -We live together. -I was married to her. -我们俩住在一起 -我俩曾经结过婚 -Carol,not me. -It's a bit complicated. -卡萝,不是我 -有点复杂了 -But we're fine. -Absolutely! -但是我们不错 -绝对的! So,twins! That's like two births. 双胞胎,好像要生两次 Ouch! 噢! to you too,Helen. 彼此,海伦 -Nina Bookbinder is here to see you. -Okay,send her in. -妮娜.布克宾德来找你 -好的,让她进来 -Come on in. -You wanted to see me? -妮娜,快进来 -你想见我? I was reviewing your data. You've been postdating your Friday numbers. 我刚看过你的资料 你一直填迟你周五数字的日期 -Which is bad,because...? -lt throws my WENUS out of whack. -这样很不好,因为… -这样使我的WEENUS出现问题 -Excuse me? -WENUS. -对不起? -WEENUS… Weekly Estimated Net Usage Statistics. “Weekly Estimated Net Usage Statistics” 每周估计净值使用统计 Gotcha! 对 Won't happen again. I wouldn't want to do anything to hurt your WENUS. 不会再发生了 我不会做任何事伤害你的…维纳斯(WEENUS) I'll take "ldiots in the Workplace" for 200,Alex. 要我就在“工厂里的白痴”上押200,亚里克斯 It's not just that she's cute,okay? It's just that... 这不是她漂不漂亮的问题,这是… ...she's really,really cute. 她真的很漂亮 It doesn't matter. You don't dip your pen in the company ink. 都一样,兔子不吃窝边草 Ross,your little creature's got the remote again. 罗斯你的小动物又在玩遥控器 Marcel,give Rossy the remote. 马修,把遥控器给罗斯 Marcel! 马修! Marcel,you give Rossy the remote right now! 马修,现在马上把遥控器给罗斯 You give Rossy the remote 把遥控器给罗斯 -Great. -Relax. I'll fix it. -这下好了 -放心.我会修好的 Oh,cool! Urkel in Spanish is Urkel. 酷在西班牙文中叫“乌酷” How did he do this? 他是怎么办到的? Is leaving Christmas lights up your plan to keep us merry all year long? 你让圣诞灯开是想让我们“快乐”一整年? No,someone was supposed to take them down but obviously someone forgot. 不,某人在新年期间就应该把它拿下 她显然是忘了 Someone was supposed to write, "Rach,take down the lights"... 某人应该写个字条“瑞秋,拿下圣诞灯” ...and put it on the refrigera 然后贴在冰… -How long has that been there? -A really long time. -在这儿多久了? -时间可不短了 -Where you been? -Riff's. -你上哪儿去了? -瑞佛餐厅 I think Ursula likes me. I ordered coffee. 我想乌苏拉喜欢我 我只点咖啡 She brought me a tuna melt and four plates of curly fries. 她却端给我鲔鱼和四盘的薯片 Score. 有门了 She is so hot! 她好带劲儿 Before you do anything Joey-like, you might want to run it by.... 你展开“乔依”行动之前, 或许你可以找… -Pheebs? -Yeah. -菲比? -当然 Is it okay if I asked out your sister? 菲比,我约你姐出去你会介意吗? Why? Why would you want to do that? Why? 为什么?你为何要那样做?为什么? So if we went out on a date, she'd be there. 因为如果我去约会时,她就会在我身边 Well,I'm not my sister's, you know,whatever. 好吧,不管怎样,我不是她 And I mean,it's true, we were one egg once. 没错,我们确实曾待在同一颗卵子 But you know, we've grown apart so.... 但我们各自发育 I don't know. Why not? 我不知道…有何不可? Cool. Thanks. 酷.谢啦 -You okay? -Yeah,I'm fine. -你还好吧? -还好 Do you wanna watch Laverne y Shirley? 你还要继续看? Sorry. 抱歉 Hi. Sorry I'm late. Where's Carol? 抱歉,我迟到了.卡萝在哪儿? Stuck at school. Some parent-teacher thing. 学校有事,老师和家长间的事 You can go. I'll get the information. 你可以走了,我留下来上课 No,I think I should stay. We should both know what's going on. 不…我应该留下来 我们两个都该留下来上课 Oh,good. This will be fun. 很好,一定会很有意思的 We're gonna start with some basic third-stage breathing exercises. 首先是第三阶段基本呼吸练习 Moms,get on your back. 各位妈妈请躺下 And coaches,you should be supporting Mommy's head. 教练们支撑妈妈们的头 -What? -What? -什么? -什么? -I'm supposed to be the mommy? -I'll play my sperm card once more. -我该当妈? -好吧,我再打一次精子牌 I have to miss the coaching training because I'm a woman? 只因我是个女人 我就得错过教练训练 -So,what do we do? -I'll flip you for it. -了解,你说该怎么办? -掷铜板 On your back,Mom! 躺下吧,妈 All right,mommies,take a nice deep,cleansing breath. 各位妈妈们,请深呼吸 Good. 很好 Now imagine your vagina is opening like a flower. 很好,现在请想像你的阴道 像花一样绽放着 -Mr. D! How's it going,sir? -It's been better. -迪先生,如何? -好多了 The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in. 年度净值已经算出来了 -And? -It's pretty ugly. -然后呢? -奇惨无此 We haven't seen an ANUS this bad since the '70s. 70年代之后没见过这么惨的ANUS -What does this mean? -We'll be laying off people. -这代表什么? -每个部门都得裁员 I know I was late last week. But I slept funny and 我知道虽然我上星期迟到, 我那天睡姿不良把头发睡塌? Not you. Relax. 不是你,放松 Ever have to fire anyone? 曾经必须开除某人吗? No,but that's not a problem. That's why my name's on the door. 没有,不过那不成问题. 这就是我的名字在门上的原因啊 Do you know when I'm getting my name on the door? 你知道我什么时候,能在门上有自己的名字吗? I don't know. I put it in the thing. 我不清楚.我会记下来的 It's okay. So,who is it gonna be? 不说这些.那将会是谁呢? Nina! 妮娜! Nina. 妮娜 Nina. 妮娜 Are you okay? 你没事吧? Yes. Yes,I am. 是的,我没事 Listen,the reason that I called you in here today was.... 听着,我今天叫你进来…是因为 Please don't hate me. 请别恨我 What? 怎么了? Would you like to have dinner sometime? 能约你共进晚餐吗? So,what do you want for your birthday? 菲比,你想要什么生日礼物? What I want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me. 我想要我妈复活和我共享人生 Okay. Let me put it this way. Anything from Crabtree & Evelyn? 好吧.这样吧.想不想要“艾芙琳”的产品? -Bath salts would be nice! -Okay! Good. -我想要浴盐! -好的! What is this place? 这是什么地方? You're cold,I have to pee and there's coffee. How bad could it be? 你很冷,我想尿尿, 窗户上有个咖啡杯 还有比这更糟的吗? I think we have an answer. 我想我们有答案了 Why is she here? 她怎么会在这儿? This could be God's way of telling us to eat at home. 也许这就是老天爷叫我们回家吃饭的方法 -Think Riff's fired her? -No,we were there last night. -她被瑞佛餐厅开除? -不,昨晚我们还在那儿吃饭,她不断端来剑鱼 Are you gonna go to the...? 你不是要去…? -I'll wait till we order. It's her. -lt looks like her. -不,点完之后再去 -是她吧?看起来像她 -Excuse me? -Yeah. -抱歉? -是 Hi,it's us! 是我们 Right. And it's me! 好呀,是我 Your turn. 该你了 -We know what we want. -That's good. -我们知道我们要什么 -很好 -Two caffe lattes. -And some biscotti. 我们要两杯拿铁还有小饼乾 Good choice. 不错的选择 -It's definitely her. -Yeah. -绝对是她 -绝对是她 I can't believe you haven't told that girl she doesn't have a job. 我真不敢相信, 你还没告诉她她失业了? You haven't taken down the Christmas lights. 你还没把圣诞灯拿下来 Congratulations! You've found the world's thinnest argument. 恭喜!你发现了世上最薄弱的论点 I'm finding the right moment. 我只是在寻找适当的时机 That shouldn't be so hard now that you're dating. 应该不会太难找到 因为你们已开始约会 "Honey,you're fired. But how about a quickie before I go to work?" 亲爱的,你被开除了 我上班前何不来个“速战速决” Once you're inside, you don't have to knock anymore. 进门后就不用再敲门了 I'll get it. 我来开 -Hi,Mr. Heckles. -You're doing it again. -哈克先生 -你们又来了 We're not doing anything. We're sitting and talking quietly. 我们什么都没做. 我们只是坐在这儿静静地聊天 I can hear you through the ceiling. 我可以透过天花板听见 My cats can't sleep. 我的猫睡不着 -You don't even have cats. -I could have cats. -你根本没养猫 -我原本有机会养 -Goodbye,Mr. Heckles. -We'll try to keep it down. -再见了,哈先生 -我们会很小声的 Phoebe,do me a favor. Try this on. I want to make sure it fits. 菲比,帮个忙,能试穿看看吗? 我想知道合不合身? My first birthday present! This is really 我的第一件生日礼物,这衣服真… No,no,it's for Ursula. I just figured size-wise.... 不,是送乌苏拉的,我只是想知道尺寸 Sure. Yeah. Okay,it fits. 好呀,合身 -Are you seeing her again? -Yep,lce Capades. -你今晚又和她约会? -对,去看花样滑冰 This is serious. I've never known you to pay for any kind of "capade." 这回你是来真的 没想到你会为任何花式玩意儿付钱 She's different. There's something about her 她与众不同,她有… That you like. We get it. You like her. Great! 你喜欢?我们懂 你喜欢她,太好了 Phoebe,I asked you. You said it was okay. 菲比,我问过你而你也同意了 Maybe now it's not okay. 也许现在不同意了 Okay! 好吧! IKnit,good woman,knit! 快织,好女人 And that's the Chrysler Building right there. 克莱斯勒大楼就在那儿 -Nina! -Mr. Douglas. Cool tie. -妮娜! -道格拉斯先生.领带不错 She's still here. 她还在这里? After I let her go,I got a call from her psychiatrist,Dr. Flennan 我开除她后,接到她心理医生的电话 Dr. Flennan Dr. Flynn. 佛…佛林大夫 And he informed me that she took the news rather badly. 他说她一时无法适应 In fact,he mentioned the word "frenzy." 老实说他提到“狂暴”这两个字 -You're kidding! She seems so -No. Nina? She's -她?开什么玩笑?她… -不,妮娜?她… If you asked her now... 如果你现在问她 ...she'd have no recollection of being fired at all. 她根本记不得被开除这件事 -That's unbelievable. -And yet believable. -难以置信 -你不得不信 So I decided not to fire her again until she'll be no threat to anyone. 因此我决定暂时不再开除她 直到我确定她对自己或其他人不构成威胁为止 I guess you never know what's going on inside a person's head. 人的心中在想什么 别人永远无法完全了解 Well,I guess that's why they call it psychology,sir. 我想这就是为什么被成为“心理学”了 The sound Mom and Dad will never forget. 爸妈永远忘不了这声音 For this,after all, is the miracle of birth. 这个,毕竟是生产的奇迹 Lights,please. And that's having a baby. 请开灯,这一集是生宝宝 Next week is our final class. 下周是我们的最后一堂课 Susan,go deep. 苏珊,准备接球 -It's just impossible. -What is,honey? -这太离谱了… -怎么了? What that woman did. 那个女人干了什么 I am not doing that. It'll just have to stay in. 我不会这么做的.他得留在我体内 Everything will be the same. It'll just stay in. 一切和原来一样,他得留在我体内 -Carol,honey,it'll be all right. -What do you know? -卡萝,亲爱的,不会有事的 -你怎么知道? No one's asking you,"Mind if we push this pot roast through your nostril?" 你怎么知道?没人问你,我能将这肉块穿你的鼻孔吗? Carol,sweetie. Cleansing breath. 卡萝,亲爱的,深呼吸 I know it's frightening. But big picture: 我知道你很惶恐,往远处想 The birth part is just one day. 生产过程只是一天 When it's over,we'll all be parents for the rest of our lives. 结束后我们这辈子都是他的父母了 I mean,that's what this is all about,right? Ross? 怀胎生子为的不就是这些吗?罗斯? Ross? 罗斯? I'm gonna be a father. 我要当爸爸了 -This is news to you? -I knew I was having a baby. -你才刚知道? -我一直都知道我有个孩子 I just never realized the baby was having me. 只是不知道孩子有我 -You'll be great. -How can you say that? -你会是个好爸爸的 -你怎会知道? I can't even get Marcel to stop eating the bathmat. 我连阻止马修吃浴室垫都办不到 -How will I raise a kid? -Some scientists are now saying... -我如何养儿育女? -罗斯,科学家说 ...that monkeys and babies are actually different. 孩子和猴子是不一样的 You might want to look into it. 我们可以验证一下 -Where you going? -Out. -你去哪里? -外面 With...? 和谁? Yes. 是的 Can I just ask you one question? 能问你一个问题吗? Have you two,you know, like,you know? 你们有没有,你明白的,就像,你知道的嘛? You know,yet? 你知道的,对吧? Not that it's any of your business, but no,we haven't. 不关你的事,没有,行了吗? You meant sex,right? 你是指性吧? -Do you have a sec? -Sure. What's up? -有空吗? -当然,什么事? The past few days,people have been avoiding me and giving me weird looks. 最近几天,大家都避开我 而且以奇怪的眼神看我 Well,maybe that's because they're jealous of us. 或许他们在嫉妒我们 Maybe. But that doesn't explain why they keep taking my scissors. 或许吧,这无法解释他们为何拿走我的剪刀 Maybe that's because you're getting a big raise! 或许是因为你被升职的缘故 Oh,my God! You're amazing! 天啊,你真是太了不起了 You don't know. 你不知道 Helen,do the paperwork on Miss Bookbinder's raise. 海伦,能快处理布小姐升职的手续吗? You still want me to send her psychological profile to Personnel? 你仍要我拿她的心理分析结果到人事部? Helen drinks. 海伦喝醉了 Will you marry me? 你愿意嫁给我吗? So after the proposal, I kind of unraveled. 升职后的事情,我就未经修剪了 Right. Because you were really in control up until then. 是啊.因为你控制全盘直到那个时候 -I told her everything. -How'd she take it? -最后我把一切都告诉她了 -她的反应如何? Pretty well. Except for the stapler thing. 坦然接受,除了拿钉书机钉我之外 A tip. If you're ever in a similar situation... 提示.以后遇见类似的状况 ... never,ever leave your hand on the desk. 切记别把手放在桌上 Okay,I think I get how to do this. 我知道该怎么调成这样了啊 Can we turn it off? Make them go away because I can't watch. 我们能把这关掉吗? 把他们弄走,因为我没法看了啊 Okay,they're gone. 好了,现在没有了 Are you all right? 你还好吧? It's just this whole stupid Ursula thing. 还不是乌苏拉惹的祸 Pheebs,can I ask? So he's going out with her. Is it really so terrible? 菲比,我能问… 他和她约会真有那么糟吗? Yeah. 是的 I'm not saying she's evil or anything. 我不是说她是很坏 She's just always breaking my stuff. 她总是弄坏我的东西 When I was 8,she threw my Judy Jetson Thermos under the bus. 我8岁时,她把我得朱迪杰特森 热水壶丢到公车下 And then when I was 1 2, she broke my collarbone. 我12岁的时候,她弄断了我的锁骨 She didn't mean to do it but I think it still counts. 她不是有意的,不过也算 And then there's Randy Brown, who was like 然后,有个蓝迪布朗,就像 Have you ever had a boyfriend who was your best friend? 你们有没有过男友身兼好友的情况? That's what he was for me. 我当时的状况就是如此 And she kind of stole him away and then broke his heart. 她把他抢走又伤了他的心 Then he wouldn't talk to me anymore. 他从此不和我说话 He didn't want to be around anything that looked like either one of us. 因为他说他不愿再见像她的人 I know Joey's not my boyfriend or my thermos... 我知道乔伊不是我男朋友或者热水壶 ...or anything,but 或其他的什么,但是 -You won't lose him. -You gotta talk to Joey. -你不会失去他的 -你得找乔伊谈 -lf he knew how you felt -But he's falling in love with her. -如果他知道你的感受 -但他爱上她了 They've been going out a week. 拜托,他们才约会一个星期 They haven't even slept together yet. That's not serious. 根本还没上床八字都还没一撇呢 Okay. Okay. 好吧.好吧 May we help you? 需要帮忙吗? What are you doing? It's freezing! Come inside. 瑞秋,你在干什么?外面好冷,进来好吗? No,you wanted me to take them down... 不…你要我把灯取下 ...so I'm taking them down,okay? 我正在做,行吗? Rachel! 天啊,瑞秋! I'm okay. I'm okay. 我没事… Mr. Heckles? 哈克先生… Mr. Heckles,could you help me,please? 哈克先生…能帮一下忙吗? This is just the kind of thing I was talking about. 我指的就是这种事儿 My friend was taking down Christmas lights... 我朋友取下圣诞灯时 ...and may have broken her ankle. 从阳台跌下来,可能伤了脚踝 -Fill this out and bring it back. -Here you go. -填好资料后拿给我 -给你 All right. Name,address. 姓名?地址 -Are you currently on any medication? -No. -你现在进行任何药物治疗? -没有 Oh,wait! Yes. Blistex. 哦,等等!有.Blistex（一种药用润唇膏） -No. In case of emergency,call...? -You. -填没有，紧急联络电话? -你 -Really? -Yeah. -真的? -对 Oh,that is so sweet! 你真好 Gosh,love you. Okay,insurance? 我爱你.保险? Oh,yeah,check it. Definitely gonna want some of that! 哦,打勾,我当然需要保险 -You don't have insurance? -How much will this cost? -你没有保险? -要多少钱? X-rays alone could be $200! 单是X光就可能得要好两百元 -What are we gonna do? -There's not much we can do. -我们该怎么办? -没有太多办法可想 Unless I use yours. 除非我用你的 -No,no,no. -Now wait a second. -不,不,不 -等等 Who did I just put as my emergency person? 我的紧急连络人是谁? That's insurance fraud. 这是保险欺诈 All right then,forget it. Might as well just go home. 好吧.算了.我回家 -Okay,come here. I hate this. -Thank you. I love you. -好吧,回来,我真讨厌这样做 -谢谢?我爱你 Hi. I'm gonna need a new set of these forms. 我需要新表格 -Why? -I am really an idiot. -为什么? -我真是个笨蛋 I was filling out her form... 我替我朋友填资料时 ...and instead of putting her information I put mine. 填的不是她的资料而是我的 You are an idiot. 你真是个笨蛋 Yep,that's me. I am that stupid. 没错?这就是我.我就是那么笨 I had a dream. I was playing football with my kid. 我梦见我和我儿子在玩橄榄球 -That's nice. -No,no. With him. -真温馨 -不?他是球 I'm on this field, and they hike me the baby. 我在球场上,他们叫我以儿子做裆下开球 I've gotta do something. The Tampa Bay defense is coming right at me! 我得做点什么,坦帕湾队的防守球员逐渐逼近 -Tampa Bay's got a terrible team. -Right,but... -坦帕湾队烂得可怕 -没错? ...it is just me and the baby, so I'm thinking they can take us. 但只有我和我儿子.我想我们死定了 And so I just heave it downfield! 所以我只好传球 -What are you,crazy? That's a baby! -He should take the sack? -什么?你疯啦?他是你儿子 -他该擒抱? Anyway,suddenly I'm downfield. 总之,突然我又到了前场 And I realize I'm the one who's supposed to catch him. 我发现该接球的人是我 I know I'm not gonna get there in time. 但我绝对来不及 So I am running and running. That is when I woke up. 于是我跑啊跑,然后就惊醒了 See? I am so not ready to be a father. 看?我还没准备好当爸爸 You're gonna be fine. 你没问题的 You're one of the most caring, responsible men in North America. 你是全美最细心,最有责任感的男人 You're gonna make a great dad. 你将来一定是个好爸爸的 Have you ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it expensive? 你们去过彩虹厅吗?真有那么贵? Well,only if you order stuff. 当然,只有你去才会贵 I'm taking Ursula tonight. It's her birthday. 我今晚要带乌苏拉去,今天是她生日 -What about Phoebe's birthday? -When's that? -菲比的生日该怎么办? -什么时候? -Tonight. -What are the odds of that happening? -今晚 -怎么会有这么巧的事情发生呢? You take your time. 慢慢想吧 There it is! 原来是这样啊! -What'll you do? -What can I do? -你打算怎么办? -我能怎么办? I don't wanna screw it up with Ursula. 我不想让乌苏拉不开心 And your friend? 你的朋友菲比呢? If she's my friend,she'll understand. Wouldn't you? 如果她是我朋友希望她能谅解. 你们能谅解吗? If you tried that on my birthday... 我生日时如果你敢这样做 ...you'd be staring at the end of a hissy fit. 我就和你没完没了 Saffron makes all the difference. 加上少量蕃红花,就能使情况完全改观 -Okay. Monica? -Yes. -摩妮卡? -是… -Yes,she is. -Hi,this is my friend Rachel. -是…她 -她是我朋友瑞秋 -Hi,I'm Dr. Mitchell. -And I'm Dr. Rosen. -瑞秋?我是米契尔大夫 -我是罗森大夫 I'm okay here. 我在这没问题 No,this is why I became a doctor. Ankles and stuff like that. 不了,这就是我为什么做了一声. 脚踝之类是我得专长啊 -Aren't you too cute to be a doctor? -Excuse me? -你当医生是否太帅了一点? -抱歉? God,young,young. I meant young. Young to be a doctor. Good,Rach. 天哪,年轻,我是指年轻 你当医生稍嫌年轻了点,说得好,瑞秋 -Thank you. -Right. -谢谢 -好的 He said it was just a sprain. 他说这只是扭伤 The cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow,and I said yes. 这位两位帅哥大夫约我们明晚出去, 我答应了 I think it's insane. They work for the hospital. 你根本就是疯了,他们在医院工作 It's like returning to the scene of the crime. 我们这样不是回到犯罪现场? -I say we blow off the dates. -What? They are cute. -还是取消约会吧 -什么?他们可是大帅哥 They are doctors. Cute doctors. Doctors who are cute. 而且还是医生.帅哥医生?很帅的医生 All right,what have we learned so far? 目前为止我们学习到什么? Oh,God. Okay. 天啊 Surprise! 惊喜 What are you doing? You scared the crap out of me! 你们在干什么?把我吓死了! -Was that the cake? -Yeah. I got a lemon schmoosh. -那是蛋糕吗? -对?柠檬口味 Come on. She'll be here any minute. 快?她随时会到 Hope it's okay. 希望蛋糕没事 "Happy Birthday Peehee." “生日快乐?菲…” Maybe we can make a "B" out of a rose. 或许我们可以用玫瑰当“比” We'll just use our special cake tools. 对?用我们的特殊蛋糕工具 -What's going on? -We just -什么事? -我们只是 Surprise! 惊喜! This is so great! Oh,my God! This was not at all scary. 你们真是太好了,一点都不吓人 Look! "Happy Birthday Peehee." 看哪!“生日快乐,菲” What a strange new nickname. I like it! Oh,my God! 好奇怪得昵称啊.我好喜欢,哦上帝! Hi,everybody. Hi,Betty! Betty,hi! 各位?贝蒂!贝蒂! You found Betty! Oh,my gosh! This is so great. 你找到贝蒂?太好了 Everybody I love is in the same room. Where's Joey? 我爱的大家都同在一起,乔伊在哪儿? Did you see Betty? 你看见贝蒂没? I wouldn't mind having a piece of this sun-dried tomato business. 蕃茄干事业真好赚 Five years ago,if somebody had said, "A tomato that's like a prune"... 五年前如果有人说我的蕃茄像李子 ... I'd have said,"Get out!" 我就叫他滚出我的办公室 Dad,before I was born, did you freak out? 爸?我出生前你会紧张吗? I'm not freaking out! I'm saying, if someone had come to me 我不紧张,我是说如果有人对我说… Dad,I'm talking about the whole baby thing. 爸?我在谈小孩的事 Did you ever get this sort of... 你是否曾因为 ... panicky,"Oh,my God, I'm gonna be a father" thing? 将成为父亲而紧张? No. We just had kids back then. 不会.我们只是要回收种子 We didn't think about it. What else could the sun dry,I wonder? 我们根本就不想这些. 我在想除了晒干还能怎么办? Dad,come on. IKids. 老爸,不要这样,我们在说孩子 Look,your mother really did the work. I was busy with the business. 都是你妈在处理,我忙着事业 I wasn't around that much. Is that what this is about? 经常不在家,你找我来是为了这个? No,I was just wondering. 不是?我只是有点迷惑 We can make up for that. We can do stuff together. 因为我们有时间弥补 我们可以一起做某些事 You always wanted to go to Colonial Williamsburg. Let's do that. 你一直想去威廉斯堡,想去吗? Thanks,Dad,really. You know,I just.... 谢了,爸.我只是 I just needed to know... 我只是想知道 ...when did you start to feel like a father? 你何时感觉自己像个父亲 Well,I guess it must've been the day after you were born. 应该是你出生那一天 We were in the hospital room, your mom was asleep... 我们在病房,你妈在睡觉 ...and they brought you in and gave you to me. 他们把你交给我 You were this ugly little red thing. 你当时又丑又红又小 All of a sudden you grabbed my finger with your fist... 你突然用拳头紧抓住我的手指 ...and you squeezed it so tight. 紧紧捏住我的手指 And that's when I knew. 那时候我才感觉到 So you don't wanna go to Williamsburg? 你不想去威廉斯堡? We can go to Williamsburg. 我们可以去阿 Eat your fish. 吃鱼吧 -Rachel,the cute doctors are here! -Okay,coming. -瑞秋?帅哥医生来了! -来了 -Hi,come on in. -Hi,Jeffrey. -请进 -你好,麦可.杰佛瑞 We brought wine. 我们带了一瓶酒 -How could we resist? -That's great! -我们怎么能够拒绝呢? -太好了! -Monica,how's the ankle? -It's.... -摩妮卡,脚踝如何? -它啊 Why don't you tell them? After all,it is your ankle. 你何不告诉他们,这可是你的脚踝 It's feeling a lot better. Thank you. 感觉好多了,谢谢 Why don't you guys sit down, and we'll get you some glasses? 你们请坐我去拿杯子 Okay. Stat! 快坐好 Why don't we just tell them who we really are? It'll be fine. 我们何不表明我们的身份 绝对不会有事的 -We'll get in trouble. -Would you stop being such a wuss? -我们会惹上大麻烦 -摩妮卡,别那么不争气 A wuss? Excuse me for living in the real world. 不争气?抱歉,我生在真实的世界之中 -So? -So they still seem normal. 所以呢?她们似乎很正常 Because they are. 但你得承认 When we go out with women from the hospital 每次我们和女病患约会都… Relax. Take a look around. There are no pagan altars. 别紧张,看看四周.没有异教徒的神坛 No piles of bones in the corners. They're fine. Go like this: 角落没有成堆的骨头, 她们没事的,这个… We're not going to do it. Sometimes you can be such a baby! 我们绝不能这么做,有时你真的很幼稚 -I am not a baby. -Be serious. Every time -我才不幼稚 -严格来说,每次都是 -You act like a princess. -You know what? -你娇生惯养… -你知道吗? Here we go. 来 Great place. How long have you lived here? 这房子好漂亮,住在这儿多久了? I've been here about six years. 谢谢,我住在这儿六年了 And Rachel moved in a few months ago. 瑞秋几个月从才搬来 See,I was supposed to get married, but I left the guy at the altar. 对,我本来应该结婚的 但我在圣堂前离开了新郎 -Really? -Yeah. -真的? -是的 Yeah,I know it's pretty selfish, but hey,that's me! 对,我知道我很自私 但我就是这种人 -Try the hummus. -Monica,what do you do? -试试这个鹰嘴豆沙 -摩妮卡,你从事什么工作? I am a chef at a restaurant uptown. 我在上城区一家餐厅的总厨师 -Good for you. -Yeah,it is. -真有你的 -没错 Mostly because I get to boss people around,which I just love to do. 因为我喜欢指使别人 -This hummus is great. -God bless the chickpea. -这个鹰嘴豆沙不错. -上帝保佑鹰嘴豆 Oh,God! I am so spoiled! 我真是被宠坏了 That's it. 就这样了 I shoplift. 我偷东西 You had no idea that lipstick was in your pocket. 你绝对想不到唇膏在我的口袋中 Did I tell you that I think I'm so much cuter than I am? 我告诉过你们我比原来可爱多了吗? And have I mentioned that back in high school I was a cow? 对了,我有提过,我在高中是条肥猪? I used to wet my bed. 我常尿床 I use my breasts to get people's attention. 我以胸部吸引别人的注意 We both do that! 我们都一样 Monica and Rachel's apartment. 摩妮卡与瑞秋的公寓 Just one second. Rachel,it's your dad. 等等,瑞秋,是你爸 Hi,Dad. No,no,it's me. 爸?不,是我 Listen,Dad,I can't talk right now. 听我说,老爸,我现在没空 But there's something.... 但有些 There's something I've been meaning to tell you. 有些话我一直想告诉你 -Excuse me. -Remember back in freshman year? 失陪一下,记得我大一时吗? Well,Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed. 我和比利在你床上做爱 Daddy. 爸 Why? Why would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? 为什么?我干嘛和比利上床? His father tried to put you out of business! You are dead! 他爸想害你倒闭!你死定了! Hey,Rachel? Are these your condoms? 嗨,瑞秋?这是你的保险套吗? Oh,no,that was just Monica. She's drunk again. 哦,不,那是摩尼卡.她又喝醉了 I don't think "scrunchy" is a word. 我不记得“scrunchy”是一个词 Why not,if "crunchy" is a word? 为什么不是,“嘎吱嘎吱”都是一个词呢? Then I'm using that same argument for "fligament." 那这么说“fligament”也是词了啊 -Ross,he's got the remote again. -Good. -罗斯,他又在玩遥控器了 -好的 Maybe he can switch it back. 或许他能将功能变回来 Maybe not. 或许不会 Okay,Daddy? That's the other line. ok,爸爸?那是另一条线 Okay,no,not even in my bedroom. 没有,没有,也没有在我的卧室里过 Okay. Okay. Bye-bye. ok.ok.再见 Hello? 你好? Hold on a second. Let me check and see if she's here. 等等,我看看她在不在 It's the woman from the hospital. There's a problem. 医院那个女人打来的,她说表格有问题 -What do we do? -Just find out what they want. -我们该怎么办? -你去问他们想干什么 Okay. No,you do it. 不,你问 Hello. This is Monica. Yeah? 我是摩妮卡,是的? Oh,okay. Yes,we'll be right down. Thank you. 好,我们马上去,谢谢 We forgot to sign one of the admissions forms. 什么事?我们忘了签名 You were right. This was just not worth it. Let me just change. 你说得对,不值得这么做.我们改回来 -"Garge"? -Nautical term. -“Garge”? -航海时间 -Cheating man. -Okay. -作弊男 -好吧 -She still didn't call? -No. -她还没有打电话 -没有 Trouble? 有心事? Your sister stood me up. 你妹放我鸽子 Don't you hate it when people aren't there for you? 被人放鸽子的滋味不好受吧 -What is that? -"Tushy." -这是什么? -“Tushy.” -Did you try calling her? -For two days. -你有打电话给她吗? -我连打了两天 At the restaurant they said she was busy. 打给餐厅时他们说她太忙 I can't believe she's blowing me off! 我不敢相信她想甩掉我 -We had the two chef salads. -And how were they? -我们吃了两份主沙拉 -我们还能怎样? No,we haven't had them yet. We're still hoping to have them. 不,我们还没有吃.我们只是希望吃那个 Okay. 好吧 -You got a minute? -Yeah,I'm just working. -有空吗? -有,我只是在工作 So. 那… -I got you a birthday present. -Wow,you remembered. -我为你买了生日礼物 -呜,你记得 -It's a Judy Jetson thermos. -Like the kind you -是个茱蒂杰森热水壶 -对,像你… Right. Oh,I got something for you too. 对,我也有东西送你 -How'd you know I was coming? -Yeah,twin thing. -你怎知道我会来? -我们是双胞胎嘛 I can't believe you did this. 我不敢相信你会这么做 I can't believe you did this. 我不敢相信你会这么做 So,what's the deal with you and Joey? 你和乔伊之间呢? Oh,right. He is so great. But that's over. 他人很好,但我们结束了 -Does he know? -Who? -他知道吗? -谁? Joey. You know, he's really nutsy about you. 乔伊.他对你着迷不已 -He is? Why? -You got me. -是吗?为什么? -你可把我问倒了 Right. Excuse me,doesn't this come with a side salad? 没错.抱歉,这道菜不是有沙拉吗? So are you gonna call him? 你会打电话给他吗? -You think he likes me? -No. Joey. -你认为他喜欢我? -不,是乔伊 Oh! No,he is so smart. He'll figure it out. 不,他很聪明,他会了解的 Do you want some chicken? 想吃鸡肉? -You have not changed. -Yeah,you too. -你还是没变 -你也一样 Thanks. Excuse me? My side salad? 谢谢.抱歉?我的沙拉在哪? Service here is horrible. Now I know what people mean. 这里的服务很差.现在我明白为什么了 Hi! Remember us? 记得我们吗? You called about needing a signature on the form? 你刚打电话要我们过来在表格上签名? Well,it turns out we need a new one. 但我们需要一张全新的表格 Because,you see, I put the wrong name again. 我又写错名字了 -Because -You're that stupid! -因为… -你就是那么笨 I am. I'm that stupid. 对,我就是那么笨 And I'm gonna pay for this with a check. 我要用支票付帐 Your insurance will cover that. 你不知道保险会给付吗? I know. I'm just not that bright either. 我知道,只是我也没那么聪明 Mon,I'm sorry. I don't think you're like your mother. 摩尼卡,对不起, 我不是真的认为你像你妈妈 That's all right. And I don't think you were selfish. 没关系.我也不认为你逃婚很自私 Oh,and I'm sorry I said you were a cow. 哦,对不起我说你在中学时是肥猪 That's okay,I was a cow. 没关系,我就是肥猪 I know. I'm just sorry I said it. 我知道,我只是为我说了这话抱歉 Worst case scenario: Say you never feel like a father. 最糟糕的情况是,你从未感觉像个爸爸 Say your son never feels connected to you as one. 你儿子从未感觉你像个爸爸 Say all of his relationships are affected by this. 他所有的关系全受这个的影响 -Do you have a point? -You know,you'd think I would. -你这话有没有重点? -应该有的 What's up with the simian? 这只猴子到底怎么了? -It's just a fur ball. -All right. -只是毛球 -好吧 -Whose turn? -Yours. I got 43 points for "kidney." -该谁了? -你.我的kidney得了43分 No,you got zero points for "idney." 不,你没得分.你拼的是“idney” I had a "K." Where's my "K"? 不,我有k,我的k在哪儿? You've got to help me! My monkey swallowed a "K"! 快帮我,我的猴子把k吞了 -Get that animal out! -The animal hospital is across town. -把你的动物带走! -不,你不懂.动物医院离这儿很远 -What's going on? -Marcel swallowed a Scrabble tile. -怎么回事? -马修吞了一个字母 Excuse me. This hospital is for people! 抱歉,这是为人看病的医院 He is people! He has a name,okay? 小姐,它是人,他有名字 He watches Jeopardy!,he touches himself when nobody's watching. 他看守“幸运轮”,没人看时它就摸自己 Please,have a heart. 拜托,发挥你的爱心 -I'll take a look at him. -Thanks. -我替它看看 -谢谢 -Michael! -Rachel. -麦克! -瑞秋 -What? -Monica. -什么? -莫尼卡 Urs,what are you doing here? I've been trying to call you. 乌苏拉?你怎么会在这儿? 我一直打电话找你 Listen.... 听我说 Don't say "listen." I know that "listen." I've said that. 不,别叫我听.我知道你的意思 我也叫人听我说过 -I'm sorry. -I don't get it. What happened? -抱歉 -我不懂,你怎么了? What about what you said under the bridge? 你在桥下说过的话呢? Yeah. You should just forget about what I said under the bridge. 你得忘记我在桥下说过的话 I was talking crazy that night. I was so drunk. 我那一夜喝醉了,胡言乱语 -You don't drink. -That's right,I don't. -你不喝酒 -没错,我不喝酒 -But I was drunk on you. -Oh,Urs -但我爱你爱得如痴如醉 -乌苏拉 But it's not gonna work. 我们是没有结果的 Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe? 为什么?因为我是菲比的朋友? Would you stop hanging out with her? 如果是,你愿意不和她来往吗? No,I couldn't do that. 不行,我办不到 Then yeah,it's because of Phoebe. 没错,就是因为她 So,you know,it's either her or me. 所以,不是她就是我 Then I'm sorry. 那么我只能说抱歉了 404

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