[00:00:00] TJ Miller TJ Miller TTTTT TJ Miller [00:00:05] TJ Miller TJ Miller TTTTT TJ Miller [00:00:10] TJ Miller TJ Miller TTTTT TJ Miller [00:00:16] [00:00:21] TJ Miller TJ Miller TTTTT TJ Miller [00:00:26] TJ Miller TJ Miller [00:00:31] I'm like Pepsi [00:00:33] I'm always second best like Melissa Etheridge [00:00:35] I'm usually in a vest [00:00:37] I'm like Home Depot [00:00:38] If I can't flow [00:00:39] There's Hispanics out front [00:00:41] Ready to go [00:00:42] I'm like Southwest [00:00:43] You're free to move around [00:00:45] But the only place I'm going is D-Town [00:00:47] I'm like Mr Clean [00:00:49] I appear out of nowhere [00:00:50] Jeffrey Tambor downtown [00:00:52] Subtle no hair [00:00:53] I'm like FEMA [00:00:54] I always come late [00:00:55] I'm like Puerto Rico [00:00:57] I'm not really a state [00:00:58] I'm like Donald Duck [00:01:00] You can't understand a word [00:01:01] I'm dangerous and friendly to kids [00:01:02] Call me Notorious BIG Bird [00:01:04] I'm like Maury Povich [00:01:05] I make a living off exploitation [00:01:07] I'm like Cubans [00:01:08] Sometimes I mix myself up with Haitians [00:01:10] I'm like Sarah Palin [00:01:11] I'm the scum of the Earth [00:01:12] I'm like Jaden Smith [00:01:13] I was set since birth [00:01:14] I'm like my mom's friend [00:01:16] Allison Galansky [00:01:17] When I have dinner parties I don't invite me [00:01:20] I'm like Dave Matthews [00:01:21] My fans are all tools [00:01:23] I'm like cricket you all [00:01:24] I don't quite understand the rules [00:01:26] I'm like an overweight advice columnist [00:01:27] Hunter-director of photography [00:01:30] I shot Dear Flabby [00:01:31] TJ Miller TJ Miller(it was a documentary actually won Best Picture) [00:01:34] TTTTT TJ Millerit(at Thundance and South By Northeast) [00:01:36] TJ Miller TJ Miller(we submitted to Cannies but it didn't take) [00:01:41] I'm like a claw-machine [00:01:43] You usually don't win [00:01:44] I'm like that all that's evil and not real [00:01:46] You can call me sin [00:01:47] I'm like a clown without makeup still kind of scary [00:01:51] I'm like a Scrabble dictionary because I'm useless [00:01:53] But with a great vocabulary [00:01:55] I'm confusing [00:01:56] Like when a girl named Mary gets married [00:01:58] I'm like Gary Coleman [00:01:59] It didn't end up so great [00:02:00] I'm like pornography [00:02:02] I use me to masturbate [00:02:03] Flight attendant to you phone I'll get you turned off [00:02:06] I'm like a creepy doctor [00:02:07] Don't turn your head when you cough [00:02:08] I'm like a butterface [00:02:10] Because I have margarine on my face [00:02:11] I'm like China in a bull shop I'm still out of place [00:02:14] I'm like cryogenics [00:02:15] No one really knows exactly what I am or if it extends one's own life [00:02:18] It's probably just science fiction to help people [00:02:20] Stave off their fear of mortality you know [00:02:23] I'm like that [00:02:24] I'm like Krevin Harbutton no one's ever heard of me [00:02:27] I'm an annoying phenomenon [00:02:29] I'm like Glee [00:02:30] I'm like LA [00:02:31] Because I take my time to crush your soul [00:02:33] I'm like New York City [00:02:34] I'm already full [00:02:36] I'm like Richard Nixon [00:02:37] Except I'm a crook [00:02:38] Like a blind person with audiotapes [00:02:40] I don't do it by the book [00:02:41] I'm like King Kong [00:02:42] Because I sweat a lot [00:02:43] I mean nobody ever talks about it but he probably sweats a lot [00:02:46] I'm like Q-tip [00:02:47] I didn't make it f**king rhyme for real but your technically [00:02:50] I'm not made of steel [00:02:51] I'm mostly water [00:02:54] I'm mostly water [00:02:57] TJ Miller TJ Miller(just give bodies was nineteen two seven water) [00:03:00] TTTTT TJ Millerit(at Thundance and South By Northeast) [00:03:03] TJ Miller TJ Miller(I mean it's like entirely water) [00:03:08] I'm like Cali Swag [00:03:09] I'm a one hit wonder [00:03:10] I'm like a cold hit without mass appeal