Handy (便利) - Weird Al Yankovic (“怪人奥尔”扬科维奇)
腾讯享有翻译作品的著作权
First things first I'm a craftsman
首先也是最重要的 我是名专业工匠
Remodelling is my only passion
旧物改造是我唯一的爱好
And I'm the greatest in the business
我可是这行业里的顶尖人才
Want referrals yo
你想要证明？
My clientele will bear you witness
我的客户就是最好的证明
I can help when your door jamb sticks
即便你的门框黏住不能动 我也搞得定
There is nothing in the world I can't fix
这世上就没有我修不了的东西
I do tiles I do stone I do bricks
什么瓷砖啊 地板砖啊 墙砖啊 我都能修
Call me I'll come rushing over with my bag of tricks
只需一通电话 身怀各种绝技的我立马现身
Where you go when your disposal is rusted
你的排污管都锈了 你还跑去哪儿
Termite problem making you disgusted
家有白蚁出没 你不恶心吗
When your front window is busted
当你前车窗破裂时
Just one man that's always trusted
此刻 只有我才是可信的男人
I'm so handy you already know
我随叫随到 你早就知道
I'll fix your plumbing when your toilets over flows
你马桶漏水时 我会立即维修你的管道
I'm so handy I'll bring you up to code
随叫随到 当你洗碗机烫得快要爆炸时
When your dishwasher's about to explode
我会让它立马恢复正常
Now you see that your furnace is needing some service
你看到你的炉灶需要加固
I'm fully bonded no need to be nervous
我会帮你完全固定好 无需担心
Perhaps you would like a new counter Formica
或许你会想买个全新的福米卡灶台
Maybe I'll hook up your dish washer combo dryer
我可以帮你安装洗碟机 组装烘干机
But all your pipes are antique
但你家所有的管道都太旧了
Your water pressure's too weak
所以你家的水压不够
You got an attic full of dry rot
你家阁楼都烂了
Because your roof sprung a leak
因为你家的屋顶漏水
Your fridge is starting to reek
你的冰箱开始冒烟
Your hardwood floors really squeak
你的实木地板松动 咯吱咯吱响
But don't you worry I'll just show you my amazing technique
但请不用担心 请让我展现我惊人的技术
Now let me glue that glue that and screw that screw that
让我粘紧 粘紧那螺丝
Any random chore you got well I can do that do that
无论你有什么烦恼 我都能帮你解决
Or maybe I'll just rewire your house for fun
或许我只是为了好玩才给你家重装电线
I got 99 problems but a switch ain't one
我有很多的问题 但这小开关可难不倒我
I'm so handy everyone said so
我随叫随到 大家都这么说
I'll grout your bathroom resurface your patio
我会修补你的浴室 重铺你家庭院地板砖
I'm so handy I'm the guy to know
我随叫随到 你吸尘器坏了的时候
When your leaf blower doesn't blow-oh-oh-oh
我就是那个知道怎么修的人
Patch the drywall clean your gutters and mow the lawn
修补干板墙 清洗排污管 修剪草坪
Make that phone call I'll install anything you want
只需一通电话 我能帮你安装任何东西
Yeah check my big staple gun my socket wrenches are second to none
是啊 看看我的超大型号的钉枪 套筒扳手也是首屈一指的
I won't quit 'til I'm done don't even care if I hammer my thumb
我才不会半途而废 即便被锤子砸了我的拇指我也不会在意
Still rocking my screwdriver
仍会转动我的螺丝刀
Got the whole world thinking I'm MacGuyver
我要让整个世界都觉得我无所不能
Your heating bills are shocking
你的暖气费高的惊人
I can solve that with some duct tape and some caulking
只需一些胶带堵缝 就能帮你轻松搞定
Your house is a disaster huh
你家就是场大悲剧
Need a guy whose a master with the plaster huh
需要一个修理大神帮你搞定
Let me be your stripper
让我来做你的脱料板
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