[00:00:00] Battle Of The Century, Part V (Vs. T.J. Miller) - T.J. Miller
[00:00:02] Our last battle was amazing
[00:00:04] But it ain't the last battle
[00:00:06] No this is the last battle
[00:00:08] We've got all star emissario
[00:00:10] TJ miller goin' up against
[00:00:12] The second degree black belt kung fu of rhyme
[00:00:15] TJ miller in a slightly lower pitch
[00:00:18] So check it out y'all
[00:00:19] TJ versus tj in this battle 'til death
[00:00:22] Winner takes all
[00:00:24] Battle battle battle battle
[00:00:29] TJ miller aka the stone cold killer
[00:00:32] Work with the big fives still waitin' on stiller
[00:00:35] Hustler hustlin' since '03 you know me
[00:00:38] It's tj miller the barely an mc
[00:00:40] Got money for days for weeks even
[00:00:42] I'm the demigod so haters are heathens
[00:00:46] Spit so fast it's a wonder I'm still breathin'
[00:00:48] Could've been you when I was a baby
[00:00:50] Before I started teethin'
[00:00:51] Forgot your name I'll call you t gay buttfiller
[00:00:54] The only assassination you make is your a buzzkiller
[00:00:56] I spit surrepticious
[00:00:58] With the daggers and the clothescloaks
[00:00:59] I'm a real rapper you stick to tellin' d*ck jokes
[00:01:02] I'm the nicest rapper alive not polite
[00:01:04] Tko you already lost we didn't start the fight
[00:01:07] Quit standup you're the worst word to god
[00:01:10] You should quit movies and tv stick to improv
[00:01:12] Clover failed oh no we got a bleeder
[00:01:15] Look everyone it's the poor man's jon heder
[00:01:18] I'm jon heder nah I'm not a mormon let the gates down
[00:01:21] You're the queen of the castle that I'm stormin'
[00:01:23] Talk sh*t about standup you're like those improv snobs
[00:01:26] I'll see you all in five years at your day jobs
[00:01:29] What's that you didn't care for my comedy
[00:01:31] Well please exit to the left and buy my cd
[00:01:34] Ran from the monster trained a couple dragons
[00:01:36] Couldn't stop the train
[00:01:37] 'Cause ethan suplee and me were laggin'
[00:01:39] I'm the big cheese call me Mr stilton
[00:01:42] You bit the d*ck that feeds you you're perez hilton
[00:01:44] Oh good another fro'd
[00:01:45] Out white guy tryn'a big screen it
[00:01:47] We've seen it it wasn't very good I'm serious I mean it
[00:01:50] This guy's up a paddle without a creek
[00:01:52] Here's some news for you everyone's out of your league
[00:01:55] Dude looks like seth rogen looks like jason segel
[00:01:58] Dude even kinda looks like prince william not as regal
[00:02:01] Talk sh*t and you can act like I care
[00:02:03] Lest we forget tj you were yogi bear
[00:02:05] Wait hold up that's a piece
[00:02:07] Of groundbreaking cinema
[00:02:08] That's axiomatic from front
[00:02:09] To back like a palindrome about panama
[00:02:11] In case you didn't remember I'm from f**king denver
[00:02:14] MC's get drawn and quartered as well as dismembered
[00:02:16] Like mike judge I'm always ahead of the curb
[00:02:19] Extract what you know about me and what you heard
[00:02:22] If you dislike boredom yo I'm the cure
[00:02:24] Wash your hands with purell because you're impure
[00:02:27] The jet setting betting there'll be a yogi 2 and if not
[00:02:30] Here's a message from my money f**k you
[00:02:32] Your raps suck pocket ham and a clock collection
[00:02:35] And it's my understanding
[00:02:36] You rarely achieve an erection
[00:02:37] You have trouble holding down a real relationship
[00:02:40] You *sshole when I give someone
[00:02:41] A brand new one it's you I rip
[00:02:43] Toddler body your face looks like god was tired
[00:02:46] I'm the donald trump card you're fired
[00:02:48] Third rate movies tv shows all got cancelled
[00:02:51] You're bad at hip hop why not try dancehall
[00:02:54] You're the never gonna be and the never was
[00:02:56] New math any movie without you that's a plus
[00:02:59] Can't keep it together
[00:03:00] And you're always missin' shows
[00:03:01] Can't keep the rhythm and it shows in your flows
[00:03:04] You're irresponsible you're barely a man
[00:03:07] Pasty white motherf**ker
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