The Torchum Never Stops - Frank Zappa (弗兰克·扎帕) Now dis nasty sucker is de respondable party fo de en-whiffment o' de origumal potium through de magik o' stage-kraff we be able to see him at woik He now be preparin' some ugly sh*t to make yo' life even mo' mizzable den it awready are since dis batch be resigned to render him immortal we does not know if it gwine woik yet but we kin al Hope fo' de best Flies all green 'n buzznin' In his dunjing of despair Prisoners grummle an' piss dey' clothes 'N scratch dey' matted hair A tiny light fum a window-hole A hunnit yards away Is all dey ever gets t'know 'Bouts de reg'luh life in de day An' it stink so bad de stones been chokin' 'N weepin' greenish drops In de room where de giant fowah-puffer woikin' 'N de torchum never stops De torchum never stops De torchum De torchum De torchum never stops (go on 'dewlla play dat lil' guitar one mo'gin ) Uh-oh I smells trubba he be messin' wit pigmeat heahhh muthaf**ker be rejectin' some co-log- nuh directly into de duo-deenum of de unsuspecting victim now he gone see if he immune to it by e A dab hisseff Flies all green an' buzznin' In his dunjing of despair An evil prince eats a steamin' pig In a chamber right near dere He eat de snouts an' de trotters foist De loins an' de groins I'd soon re-spersed His carvin' style I'd well re-hoist He stan' 'n shout: All main be coist All main be coist All main be coist All main be coist An' dis-ergree well no one durst He de best of cose of all de woist Some wrong been done he done it foist An' he stink so bad his bones been chokin' And weepin' greenish drops In de vat of galoot co-log-nuh Where de re-zease be berlin' up Berlin' an' uh boilin' up Co-log-nuh Co-log-nuh Galoot co-log-uh-nuh Oh do yoseff a favum 'n don't use it oooooooh look at these ugly suckers boy when white folks come back fum bein' dead they sho' gets scary-lookin' but don't take their appearance too ser Y people ' Somewhere over there I can tell There's a voice of A potato-headed whatchamacallit Who does not wish me well His clothes are quite stupid And also his shoes He's got a big ol' duck-mouth (who knows how he chews ) He thinks he knows something About the great plan How ultimate blandness Must rule and command He knows not a drop Not a crumb Not a whit Of the reason for doing This criminal sh*t And then if he did Would it matter a bit Not at all Because it is writ: Our beige-blandish god Tends to certify it: "only the boring and bland shall survive Only the lamest of lameness will thrive " Take it or leave it you won't be alive If you are overtly creative Fairies and faggots and queers are 'Creative' All the best music on broadway is 'Native' Who will step forward And end all this trouble For beige-blandish citizens Clutching the rubble Of vanishing dreams Of wimpish amusement Replaced by a rash Of 'creative' confusement Soon my brave zombies You'll make your return Broadway will glow Broadway will burn Along with the remnants of Everything new My holy disease will do Wonders for you Those lovely producers Who paid for you 'then' Will do it again and again and again The spying potato With horrible diction Will rot in the garbage When this show's eviction Takes place shortly after My alternate skill Of theatrical sabotage Triumphs your will I've a special review I've been saving for years For a show just like this With potatoes and queers I'll say it's disgusting atrocious and dull I'll say it makes boils inside of your skull I'll say it's the worst-of-the-worst of the Year No wind down the plain and it's hard on your Ear I'll say it's the work of an infantile mind I'll say that it's tasteless and that you will Find A better excuse to spend money or time At a tupper-ware party So do be a smarty Hold on to that dollar A little while longer For spending it here Why it couldn't be wronger What's happened to broadway Where's it gone all the glitter The 'heart' and the 'soul' The patter The pitter And after this deadly review hits the paper