[00:00:00] "Let's meet contestant number one
[00:00:03] He's a skitsofrantic serial killer clown
[00:00:05] Who says "woman love his sexy smile"
[00:00:09] Let's find out if his charm will work on Sharon
[00:00:12] Sharon what's your question "
[00:00:13] "Contestant number one
[00:00:14] I believe first impressions last forever
[00:00:16] So let's say you were to come over to my parent's house
[00:00:19] And have dinner with me and my family
[00:00:21] Tell me what you would do to make
[00:00:23] That first impression really stick"
[00:00:25] Let's see uh well I'd have to think about it
[00:00:28] I might show up in a tux HA but I doubt it
[00:00:32] I'd probably just show up naked like I always do
[00:00:34] And look your momma in the eye and tell her "F**K YOU "
[00:00:38] Hurry up b**ch I'm hungry I smell spaghetti
[00:00:41] I'd pinch her loopy a** and tell her "Get the food ready "
[00:00:44] Your dad will probably start tripping and get me pissed
[00:00:47] I'd have to walk up and bust him in his f**king lips
[00:00:50] It's dinner time we hearing grace from your mother
[00:00:54] I pull a forty out and pour some for your little brother
[00:00:57] I'm steady staring at your sister I'll tell you this
[00:01:00] You know for only 13 she got some big tits
[00:01:03] After that your dad will try to jump again
[00:01:06] And only this time I'd put the forty to his chin
[00:01:09] After you mom does the dishes and the silverware
[00:01:12] I'd dry-f**k her till I nut in my underwear
[00:01:23] "Now let's me contestant number two
[00:01:26] He's a psychopathic deranged crackhead freak
[00:01:29] Who works for the Dark Carnival
[00:01:31] He says women call him stretch nuts
[00:01:33] Sharon let's hear your question"
[00:01:35] "I like a man who's not afraid to show his true emotions
[00:01:38] A man who expresses himself in his own special way
[00:01:42] Number two if you fell in love with me
[00:01:44] Exactly how would you let me know "
[00:01:47] First thing I could never love you
[00:01:50] You sound like a richie-b**ch yo F**K YOU
[00:01:54] But if I did I'd probably show you that I care
[00:01:57] By taking all these other motherf**kers outta here
[00:02:00] I'd go through your phone book and whack em all
[00:02:03] And find contestant number one and break his f**king jaw
[00:02:06] Anyone who looked at you would have to pay
[00:02:09] I'd be blowing f**king nuggets off all day
[00:02:13] I'd grab your titties and stretch em down past your waist
[00:02:16] Let em go and watch em both spring up in your face
[00:02:19] I'd sing love songs to you the best I can
[00:02:22] Get you naked and hit it like a CAVEMAN
[00:02:25] When we go to the beach and walk through the sand
[00:02:28] I throw a little in your face and say I'm just playing
[00:02:31] As you spit it all out I'd rub your back
[00:02:35] And grab your underwear and wedge it up your a** crack
[00:02:45] "Well it sounds like contestant number two
[00:02:47] Is just over-flowing with sensitivity Sharon
[00:02:50] It's a touch choice so far
[00:02:52] Sharon let's have your last question and
[00:02:54] See which one is going to win the rights to your neden"
[00:02:58] "Okay if we were at a dance club and you both noticed me at the
[00:03:02] Same time Tell me how would you each get my attention and what would
[00:03:05] Your pick up line be Well whoever's the smoothest wins "
[00:03:09] Okay first I'd slide up to the bar
[00:03:13] And tell you that I can't believe how f**king fat you are
[00:03:16] I'd tell that I like the way you make your titties shake
[00:03:19] And if you lost a little weight you'd look like Rickie Lake
[00:03:22] F**k that you'd be jocking me quick
[00:03:25] I'd order you a drink and stir it with my dick
[00:03:28] And then to get your attention in the crowded place
[00:03:31] I'd simply walk up and stick my nuts in your face
[00:03:35] Yeah freak with your nuts yo that'll get her
[00:03:38] Tell her that's she fat yeah that'll work even better
[00:03:41] Look f**k you I got a strong rap
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