[00:00:00] 本字幕由腾讯音乐天琴实验室独家AI字幕技术生成
[00:00:03] 鼓上蚤时迁
[00:00:05] 意外收获
[00:00:08] 她拉拢住一个小和尚
[00:00:10] 叫红本
[00:00:13] 从他嘴里头
[00:00:15] 了解到少林寺许多内幕
[00:00:20] 这事情可不简单
[00:00:23] 举一反三
[00:00:25] 能看出三部汽车
[00:00:28] 关于老贾家的事儿
[00:00:31] 无非是投一部
[00:00:33] 这个是二三小
[00:00:35] 不得而知
[00:00:38] 这是掐给出的主意
[00:00:41] 小姑娘
[00:00:42] 俊娘先挪挪窝
[00:00:44] 搬到别的屋去
[00:00:47] 把这归房给腾出来
[00:00:50] 然后他分兵派将
[00:00:54] 在这仨徒弟当中
[00:00:56] 他进行了安排
[00:00:58] 这一只小白猿
[00:01:00] 周天亮儿啊
[00:01:02] 你长得也俊美
[00:01:04] 你也机灵
[00:01:06] 你就装那个姑娘
[00:01:07] 俊娘躺在床上啊
[00:01:12] 我师父
[00:01:12] 这合适吗
[00:01:14] 我我是个小小子
[00:01:17] 嗨
[00:01:18] 又不干别的
[00:01:19] 管那是男是女呢
[00:01:21] 你没听说吗
[00:01:22] 第三光
[00:01:24] 没量发现也看不出你是谁了
[00:01:30] 呢
[00:01:30] 我能干什么
[00:01:32] 你能干什么
[00:01:33] 把家把式儿准备好了
[00:01:36] 发现脱光了衣服要想跟你安寝的医疗这废话
[00:01:44] 成吉爱你
[00:01:46] 拦腰把她抱住
[00:01:49] 千万别放手
[00:01:52] 我说按成交啊
[00:01:54] 郎溪
[00:01:56] 你躲在床后面
[00:01:59] 你看
[00:01:59] 天亮了一下手
[00:02:01] 你马上动家伙摁住了双腿
[00:02:06] 啊
[00:02:07] 描述a 我干什么
[00:02:10] 你干什么呢
[00:02:11] 你准备绳子
[00:02:14] 他们哥俩把他摁不住了
[00:02:16] 你马上拿绳捆
[00:02:20] 越结实越好
[00:02:22] 明白了
[00:02:25] 安藤交易不了脑袋
[00:02:27] 老西啊
[00:02:28] 那我们仨都有活了
[00:02:31] 您老人家干什么
[00:02:32] 废话
[00:02:34] 我是元帅
[00:02:35] 我分兵派将我自然有活了
[00:02:39] 首先
[00:02:41] 我是三路接应使
[00:02:44] 你们哪
[00:02:44] 路不到还有我呢
[00:02:47] 我做补充吧
[00:02:49] 比如说
[00:02:50] 你没得手
[00:02:51] 我拿着小片儿刀
[00:02:52] 我挑他的懒筋
[00:02:54] 我扎他的肚子
[00:02:55] 我砍他的脑袋
[00:02:56] 我挖她的眼睛
[00:02:58] 我干什么不行
[00:03:01] 这还用你问西啊
[00:03:04] 我就怕老西啊
[00:03:05] 你老也没活
[00:03:07] 再把待废了行不行啊
[00:03:09] 到时候你活动活动也有好处
[00:03:12] 他妈这小子坚守啊啊
[00:03:16] 都听懂了
[00:03:16] 骂都听懂了
[00:03:19] 好嘞
[00:03:20] 马上给我准备
[00:03:23] 屋里做好准备
[00:03:26] 窗户帘儿挂着
[00:03:27] 门帘挂着
[00:03:30] 一切就绪
[00:03:32] 十天
[00:03:33] 他也非常精细的人
[00:03:36] 看了看这屋
[00:03:38] 哪能跑哪能进
[00:03:41] 这和上机了有可能从哪儿往外闯
[00:03:45] 我那从哪儿接着他他才好的道理
[00:03:50] 他最不放心的还是那个红本和老甲头儿
[00:03:56] 一在病毒啊
[00:03:59] 两个人下了保证
[00:04:02] 石泉也进了屋儿
[00:04:05] 你心都提到嗓子眼儿
[00:04:07] 爸爸新演砸了
[00:04:10] 他捅破窗棂纸
[00:04:12] 往院呢盯着
[00:04:16] Y 头也提心吊胆
[00:04:19] 等啊等啊等啊等
[00:04:22] 雨不下了
[00:04:25] 不但不下来
[00:04:26] 云彩逐渐散去
[00:04:30] 月光透出来了
[00:04:33] 大概啊
[00:04:34] 也接近三景天了
[00:04:37] 突然有人砸门
[00:04:41] 半夜三更
[00:04:42] 这一砸门声满院儿都能听见
[00:04:45] 呢
[00:04:45] 红本和假扮金刷心也提着嗓子眼儿
[00:04:53] 贾万军赶紧叫老家人前去开门
[00:04:58] 其实
[00:04:58] 老家人不了解内情
[00:05:00] 他倒不害怕
[00:05:02] 把门开开
[00:05:05] 一瞅外边就是高大的和尚发现
[00:05:10] 这发现五十来岁
[00:05:13] 新PD 头皮儿锃明刷亮
[00:05:16] 脑袋上戴着五佛冠
[00:05:20] 身披袈裟
[00:05:22] 还换了套新风衣
[00:05:25] 背着个黄豆子
[00:05:27] 手里头拎着方便
[00:05:29] 连环铲扁着身子进了院
[00:05:34] 老家人就说有你才来
[00:05:38] 弥陀佛
[00:05:39] 贫僧来晚了吗
[00:05:41] 没有
[00:05:41] 没有
[00:05:43] 只是比往次稍微那么迟了一点
[00:05:46] 呃
[00:05:47] 我有点儿事情
[00:05:49] 虎门哪
[00:05:51] 红本有点腿肚子转筋
[00:05:54] 据说这个熊色
[00:05:57] 今儿该你到时候了
[00:06:00] 该报没报
[00:06:01] 时刻没到
[00:06:03] 但愿办差官能把你降服住
[00:06:07] 要降伏不住
[00:06:09] 头一个倒霉就是我呀
[00:06:12] 想到这儿
[00:06:12] 她有点儿紧张
[00:06:14] 赶紧迎上去
[00:06:16] 双手合十
[00:06:18] 阿弥陀佛迎接师傅
[00:06:21] 嗯
[00:06:24] 有什么变化吗
[00:06:25] 没有
[00:06:26] 一切正常
[00:06:29] 那就好啊
[00:06:31] 说话之间
[00:06:32] 走进大厅
[00:06:35] 贾万金
[00:06:37] 也强打精神
[00:06:39] 皮笑肉不笑
[00:06:41] 哎哎
[00:06:43] 师傅您来了
[00:06:44] 来了
[00:06:46] 原来这几天挺好了
[00:06:48] 挺好挺好
[00:06:50] 小姐的病是不是见好啊
[00:06:54] 我看见好
[00:06:57] 贾万金鑫说话
[00:06:59] 好你个淫贼啊
[00:07:02] 硌着你手还好得了吗
[00:07:04] 你都服透了你
[00:07:07] 缺德带冒烟儿啊
[00:07:10] 把你逮着我砍你
[00:07:12] 你白刀我都不解恨
[00:07:16] 到底是上了年纪的人
[00:07:18] 城府很深
[00:07:20] 尽管不太自然
[00:07:23] 说话没有漏洞
[00:07:26] 招待和尚喝了点水
[00:07:28] 吃了点东西
[00:07:30] 发现这台数
[00:07:32] 时间不早了
[00:07:34] 平衡
[00:07:36] 就要赶妖驱邪
[00:07:39] 给贵千金治病
[00:07:42] 我到后方去了
[00:07:44] 但是您请便
[00:07:49] 老家头心说
[00:07:50] 看来要倒霉
[00:07:53] 再说罚钱
[00:07:54] 毫无准备
[00:07:56] 高高兴兴走进闺房
[00:07:59] 一看这屋黢黑
[00:08:01] 伸手不见五指啊
[00:08:03] 他高高兴兴摸到八仙桌这把五佛冠
[00:08:08] 摘了袈裟甩掉外衣款调风邪
[00:08:14] 拔掉内衣款调
[00:08:17] 就摸到床边
[00:08:19] 哈哈哈
[00:08:22] 阿弥陀佛
[00:08:25] 姑娘
[00:08:26] 我来了
[00:08:27] 我来给你治病
[00:08:30] 哈哈
[00:08:32] 医疗连上了床
[00:08:36] 床上躺着小白
[00:08:38] 圆周天亮
[00:08:40] 周天亮浑身都紧张
[00:08:44] 攥着拳头
[00:08:45] 瞪着眼睛
[00:08:48] 心里说话好
[00:08:49] 你还羞涩
[00:08:51] 像你这种人那是死有余辜啊
[00:08:56] 他反足劲儿大
[00:08:59] 一看发现医疗背后的功夫
[00:09:03] 在看周天亮使了个鲤鱼打挺局
[00:09:09] 拦腰把和尚给抱住
[00:09:13] 和尚毫无防范心说话
[00:09:18] 今儿Jay jun 娘怎么这么大劲儿
[00:09:21] 还没怎么地就把我拦腰给抱住了
[00:09:24] 哎呀
[00:09:25] 叫我受不了
[00:09:26] 与此同时
[00:09:28] 诙解童子安腾交从床后转过来的两条腿
[00:09:35] 这会儿发现就知道情况有变
[00:09:39] 还没等喊出来
[00:09:43] 呢
[00:09:43] 苗顺子就到了
[00:09:45] 拿着条绳子就套它脖子上先勒了一下
[00:09:53] 紧跟着宁波胳膊用脚踩住了
[00:09:58] 三小同心协力
[00:10:01] 嗯
[00:10:04] 就在这会儿
[00:10:05] 石桥把灯点着了
[00:10:07] 一伸手
[00:10:08] 把窗帘、门帘全都死掉
[00:10:11] 喊了一声来
[00:10:15] 外边儿提心吊胆的人
[00:10:17] 一看成功了
[00:10:19] 全来了精神
[00:10:22] 红本没敢进屋
[00:10:24] 老甲头儿抄了条棒子头
[00:10:28] 一个劲儿
[00:10:29] 这灯光一开把和尚嘞的是呲牙咧嘴在地上捆着
[00:10:37] 赤身裸体
[00:10:39] 难看不开幕
[00:10:43] 老甲头用手一指
[00:10:45] 好你个淫僧啊
[00:10:47] 你把我们淹坑苦了
[00:10:51] 我叫你给我女儿治病吧吧
[00:10:55] 哎哟哎哟吧
[00:10:57] 哎哟哎哟
[00:10:59] 值圈一看
[00:11:00] 留着他还有用
[00:11:01] 行行行行行
[00:11:03] 妲己下先出出气
[00:11:07] 他犯的罪不是妲己棒子的事儿
[00:11:11] 我留着一口气儿
[00:11:12] 还有用啊
[00:11:13] 老人家
[00:11:14] 小星星
[00:11:15] 小星星
[00:11:17] 你看他光着身子也不好看
[00:11:21] 拽了个床单儿给他围上
[00:11:23] 就在这屋开始审讯
[00:11:28] 红本一看真逮住了这心才放下
[00:11:32] 气呼呼叉着腰在门口往屋看着
[00:11:37] 单说这发泄
[00:11:39] 这么老半天才清醒过来
[00:11:43] 元征二
[00:11:44] 往左右瞅一瞅
[00:11:48] 哎哟
[00:11:50] 闹了半天
[00:11:51] 我被胡本把我出卖了
[00:11:54] 这都什么人呢这是
[00:11:56] 嘿嘿嘿
[00:11:59] 怪我未加仔细啊
[00:12:03] 看来人心隔肚皮做事两不知哦
[00:12:07] 可把我坑哭了
[00:12:10] 到现在跑也不能跑了
[00:12:13] 这时前儿把三脚架的今天跟三角说
[00:12:19] 下面需要进行的是过堂审问
[00:12:22] 老西啊
[00:12:23] 你还过堂
[00:12:25] 废话
[00:12:25] 我怎么就不能过糖
[00:12:28] 这可叫私立公堂
[00:12:30] 对
[00:12:30] 一点儿都不假
[00:12:32] 我还想问问别的事儿啊
[00:12:36] 你们就是三班人
[00:12:38] 一站立两旁
[00:12:39] 我教你们怎么的
[00:12:41] 你们就怎么地
[00:12:42] 明白明白
[00:12:44] 在开始前居中
[00:12:46] 耳朵小脸往下一沉
[00:12:48] 小脑瓜一晃
[00:12:50] 把大腿一拍带罪犯
[00:12:55] 描述的过去
[00:12:56] 像虐死狗一样把和尚罚钱拽过来
[00:13:02] 发现了还真不服气儿
[00:13:05] 脑袋瓜子直不楞
[00:13:07] 身子直倔
[00:13:09] 把安诚邀气急了
[00:13:11] 啪啪给他俩嘴巴子
[00:13:13] 我叫你不了脑袋
[00:13:15] 我叫你不服气
[00:13:17] 我打死你个兔仔
[00:13:21] 喝着
[00:13:21] 没有办法把头一低
[00:13:25] 之前报了个肩膀
[00:13:27] 笑呵呵的瞅着
[00:13:31] 下面跪着什么人呢
[00:13:34] 嗯嗯
[00:13:38] 描述不久
[00:13:39] 端就一拳问你说话呢
[00:13:42] 你哑巴吧
[00:13:44] 不说我摘了你的牙弥陀佛
[00:13:50] 贫僧伐响
[00:13:53] 听着没
[00:13:54] 各位
[00:13:56] 他还弥陀佛呢
[00:13:58] 他算个什么东西
[00:13:59] 哎
[00:14:01] 打着佛门弟子的旗号
[00:14:04] 配着佛门的Y 1 A 座
[00:14:07] 这些损阴丧德的事情就冲这一首
[00:14:12] 什么也不问
[00:14:13] 先得揍他20 个嘴巴
[00:14:17] 来啊
[00:14:17] 星星揍
[00:14:18] 狠狠揍
[00:14:21] 老徐啊
[00:14:21] 拿什么时候拿木板把脸给我抽
[00:14:26] 家丑打折的小狗叫
[00:14:32] 顺鼻子眼儿和嘴角淌血
[00:14:36] 时间为什么这么做呀
[00:14:37] 你看和尚不服
[00:14:40] 非把他打服了
[00:14:42] 老实了
[00:14:43] 蔫吧了才能问出实话来
[00:14:46] 他不服
[00:14:47] 有对抗情绪
[00:14:49] 你能问出什么来
[00:14:50] 这就叫下马威
[00:14:54] 喝着呼呼直喘粗气时
[00:14:57] 前置才为叫什么名
[00:15:00] 我叫罚写
[00:15:03] 在哪儿出家少林寺
[00:15:07] 你会治病吗
[00:15:09] 你怎么治的
[00:15:11] 原原本本的说一说
[00:15:13] 呃啊
[00:15:15] 来呀
[00:15:16] 准备行不行
[00:15:18] 他不说就跟我走
[00:15:21] 我说我输
[00:15:23] 感觉这辈子怕中
[00:15:25] 吭哧瘪肚
[00:15:27] 吞吞吐吐
[00:15:29] 把事情的经过讲述一遍
[00:15:33] 最后给自己做了个总结
[00:15:37] 我空为佛门弟子
[00:15:39] 我没修行好
[00:15:41] 我贪淫恋色乘虚而入
[00:15:46] 借着看病为明
[00:15:49] 我把姑娘给占有了
[00:15:52] 因为
[00:15:53] 因为出家人也是人
[00:15:57] 没休息好
[00:15:58] 就有七情六欲
[00:16:00] 打他揍他的臭嘴
[00:16:06] 又一顿嘴巴
[00:16:08] 再看
[00:16:08] 发现跟吹喇叭差不多
[00:16:12] 腮帮子都鼓起来
[00:16:14] 跟扣俩馒头似的
[00:16:17] 我说
[00:16:17] 你说什么
[00:16:19] 你也有七情六欲是
[00:16:23] 可是有七情六欲的人不等于违法呀
[00:16:29] 能管住自己
[00:16:31] 你不但管不住自己
[00:16:33] 你还做这缺德的事儿
[00:16:36] 你找什么借口
[00:16:38] 有七情六欲的人就干这缺德事儿吧
[00:16:41] 故事才打你
[00:16:44] 既然你都说了
[00:16:47] 可以重新惩处
[00:16:50] 旁边记录
[00:16:52] 谁会记录
[00:16:54] 几个孩子一咧嘴
[00:16:57] 安
[00:16:58] 成交就请示时欠老西啊
[00:17:01] 我那字写得跟狗爬一样
[00:17:04] 怎么写
[00:17:06] 孩子
[00:17:06] 你怎么死心眼儿
[00:17:08] 像不像做比成样
[00:17:10] 你拿管笔就瞎晃他就行了
[00:17:13] 这是吓唬他
[00:17:15] 哦
[00:17:15] 是这么回事儿
[00:17:17] He 还能叫拿惯笔涂上
[00:17:19] 只跟真的一样
[00:17:21] 刷刷刷刷
[00:17:23] 亚贵
[00:17:25] 和尚都打蒙了
[00:17:28] 也看不出纸上写的是弯文
[00:17:30] 是哪国文字
[00:17:33] 把手压安上啊
[00:17:37] 这事儿搁在一边
[00:17:40] 我在问你一件事儿
[00:17:43] 你跟金眉罗汉、陆登云仇连瑞冷联名什么关系啊
[00:17:51] 那是我三倍师伯
[00:17:54] 哦
[00:17:54] 诗博就是施大爷
[00:17:57] 你老师是谁
[00:17:59] 我老师就是怪达摩一空和尚啊
[00:18:07] 那一空就不是东西
[00:18:09] 他能有好徒弟吗
[00:18:11] 你们简直是一丘之貉呀
[00:18:14] 我在问你
[00:18:16] 他们最近在庙上商量什么
[00:18:19] 都做了哪些打算
[00:18:21] 五月初五泰安神州立擂是怎么个内幕
[00:18:26] 你给我从实讲来
[00:18:27] 呃
[00:18:29] 我
[00:18:29] 我真不清楚
[00:18:30] 我真不知道
[00:18:31] 说说不说
[00:18:33] 我真不知道你叫我说什么啊
[00:18:37] 你不是不说吗
[00:18:38] 啪啪啪啪啪啪啪啪啪密码
[00:18:48] 打地发现呢
[00:18:50] 脸都苍起来
[00:18:52] 五官都挪了位
[00:18:54] 哎
[00:18:55] 我真不知道
[00:18:56] 打死我也不知道行行行
[00:19:00] 我叫你嘴硬
[00:19:01] 哎
[00:19:01] 刚才的事儿
[00:19:03] 你脱不了干净
[00:19:05] 所以你老老实实承认啊
[00:19:08] 这事儿你认为我不知道
[00:19:10] 你就失口否认
[00:19:12] 行类
[00:19:12] 你看看你厉害不厉害
[00:19:15] 我家员外呢
[00:19:18] 贾圆圆在旁边在呢
[00:19:21] 有什么吩咐
[00:19:23] 你们家茅房在哪
[00:19:26] 你要方便方便不
[00:19:29] 我问
[00:19:29] 茅房在哪儿
[00:19:30] 就在后院
[00:19:32] 里头货多吗
[00:19:34] 嗯
[00:19:35] 你这话我不懂
[00:19:37] 里边干的稀的多
[00:19:40] 哦
[00:19:40] 明白了
[00:19:41] 您说饭店呢
[00:19:43] 够多的
[00:19:44] 最近没考好嘞
[00:19:46] 麻烦你派俩人拿桶整半桶来
[00:19:51] 有那么好臭的
[00:19:52] 你要他干嘛
[00:19:54] 我让他吃屎
[00:19:57] 说鹌鹑浇菜
[00:19:59] 你就干这活啊
[00:20:01] 一会儿弄来崴一勺给他灌下去
[00:20:05] 不说再观
[00:20:07] 都灌满了
[00:20:08] 多拉倒
[00:20:10] 我的买菜听我老师这招都怎么想出来的
[00:20:17] 和尚一听害怕
[00:20:20] 呢
[00:20:21] 那滋味谁受得了
[00:20:23] 哎
[00:20:23] 我说
[00:20:23] 我说这不结了吗
[00:20:26] 说吧
[00:20:28] 嗯
[00:20:28] 我真的不知道
[00:20:30] 我所知道的就是一知半解
[00:20:33] 我就听他一知半解
[00:20:37] 呃
[00:20:38] 据我所知吧
[00:20:39] 数日前那个我师父一空受伤回来了
[00:20:48] 我八个师兄轮流把他抬回来
[00:20:51] 大概病了一个多月呀
[00:20:54] 经过精心调制
[00:20:56] 身体康复
[00:20:59] 后来好了之后呢
[00:21:00] 跟我三位师伯说了
[00:21:03] 也不知在哪哪发生的什么事儿就提到水泊梁山
[00:21:08] 简直他们老哥四个都恨透顶了
[00:21:12] 后来商量着要报仇
[00:21:14] 要出气
[00:21:16] 就说准备什么泰安神州立擂
[00:21:20] 说怎么把水泊梁山D 人呢一网打尽完了吧
[00:21:26] 怕人手不够
[00:21:27] 还请了许多许多的人请的
[00:21:31] 都谁说我真不知道
[00:21:35] 你慢慢说
[00:21:35] 给我灌粪你就惯八步断肠散
[00:21:39] 我也说不清楚
[00:21:40] 他们能让我知道吗
[00:21:43] 但是我就知道他们腻了个人名单
[00:21:47] 把他们研究这个计划
[00:21:49] 一步、二步三步
[00:21:51] 怎么怎么地都写在那个单上
[00:21:53] 然后把内丹封存起来了
[00:21:57] 再放这个单子的时候
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