Titties & Beer (乳房 ＆ 啤酒) - Frank Zappa (弗兰克·扎帕) It was the BLACKEST NIGHT There was no MOON in sight You know the stars ain't shinin' 'Cause the sky's too tight I heard the SCARY WIND I seen some UGLY TREES There was a WEREWOLF honkin' 'Long the side of me I'm MEAN 'n I'm BAD (y'know I ain't no SISSY) Got a BIG-TITTY GIRLY by the name of 'CHRISSY' Talkin' about her 'N MY BIKE 'N ME 'N this ride up THE MOUNTAIN OF MYSTERY (mystery) (How 're you doin' ) I noticed EVEN THE CRICKETS Acted WEIRD up here And so I figured I might Just drink a little BEER I said "Gimme summa that what yer suckin' on " But there was NO REPLY 'Cause SHE WAS GONE "Where's those TITTIES I like so well 'N' my GODDAM BEER " Is what I started to yell then I heard this noise Like a crunchin' twig 'n up jumped THE DEVIL (He's about THIS BIG ) He had a RED SUIT on An' a WIDOW'S PEAK An' then a POINTED TAIL 'N like a SULPHUR REEK Yes it was HIM awright I swear I KNOWED IT WAS He had some HUMAN FLESH Stuck underneath his CLAWS You know it looked to me Like it was TITTY SKIN I said "YOU SON-OF-A-B**CH " ('Cause I was MAD at him ) He just got out his floss 'N started cleanin' his fang So I shot him with my shooter Said: BANG BANG BANG Then the sucker just laughed 'n said: "Put it away You know I ate her all up now what you Gonna say " YOU ATE MY CHRISSY "Yeah TITTIES 'N ALL " WELL WHAT ABOUT THE BEER THEN "Now were the cans THIS tall " EVEN HER BOOTS "Would I LIE to you " SH*T YOU MUSTA BEEN HUNGRY "Yeah THIS is TRUE " DON'T THEY PAY YOU GOOD FOR THE STUFF THAT YOU DO "Well you know I can't complain when the checks come through " WELL I WANT MY CHRISSY Oh yeah 'N I WANT MY BEER Hah SO YOU JUST BARF IT BACK UP NOW DEVIL DO YOU HEAR Look: "Blow it out your a** motorcycle man I mean I am THE DEVIL do you UNDERSTAND Just WHAT WILL YOU GIVE ME for your TITTIES AND BEER I suppose you noticed this little CONTRACT here " YER GODDAM RIGHT YOU SON-OF-A-WHORE Don't call me that THAT'S ABOUT THE ONLY REASON I LEARNED WRITIN' FOR GIMME THAT PAPER BET YER HORNS I'LL SIGN BECAUSE I NEED A BEER 'N IT'S TITTY- SQUEEZIN' TIME "Man you can't fool ME You ain't THAT bad Oh yeah Why YOU SHOULDA SEEN some of the SOULS THAT I'VE HAD There was MILHOUS NIXON 'N AGNEW TOO 'N both of those suckers was WORSE 'N YOU " LET'S MAKE A DEAL IF YOU THINK THAT'S TRUE I MEAN YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE DEVIL SO WHATCHA GONNA DO HEH Now hold on just a second You wanna make a deal with me hah Yeah Well ah I don't know man you know I just don't know about this What See cause I Listen you're are you losing your nerve No man it ain't got nothin' to do with nerve You're supposed to be the devil It's got to do You're supposed to be bad It's got to do with style fool I don't know if you've the right style to get into hell You know Well actually to tell you tell you the honest to God Truth I'm very short on style as a matter of fact Yeah I know that's that's what makes me wonder But I have I I think I have something that You may be interested in What is that You can have my soul It's a mean little sucker 'Bout a thousand years old But once you gets it You can't give it back You gotta keep it forever An' that's a natural fact Ooh wee Do you read me devil Oh yeah What Am I supposed to be scared man Oh yeah Reety aw-righty Oh yeah that's real tough I bet you're real bad Listen fool you've got to prove to me that you're rough Enough to get into hell That you've got the style enough to get into hell So start talkin' Alright lemme tell ya somethin' Alright I'll prove to you that I'm bad enough to go to hell Yeah Because I have been through it Yeah I have seen it Yeah It has happened to me Yeah Remember I was signed with Warner Brothers For eight f**kin' years Tell me about it Now you're talkin' about something Now how bad is that That sounds good to me motherf**ker So move right along Tell me what your interests are you know 404

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