[00:00:00] 本字幕由腾讯音乐天琴实验室独家AI字幕技术生成
[00:00:01] 窦仙童把薛丁山引进山坡小树林
[00:00:08] 先说要率众投靠大唐
[00:00:13] 那薛丁山自然高兴了
[00:00:15] 但是这事儿呢
[00:00:17] 都是附带的
[00:00:19] 最主要的问题难以取齿
[00:00:23] 抹不开说
[00:00:25] 你说这么大的姑娘就以身相许
[00:00:29] 就说我爱你我要嫁给你
[00:00:32] 这
[00:00:33] 这这玩意没法说呀
[00:00:34] 这玩意儿慢如封建年代
[00:00:37] 就现在开化的年代
[00:00:40] 说这话也不太容易
[00:00:43] 哎哟
[00:00:44] 薛丁山不知道怎么回事儿
[00:00:45] 还紧逼问姑娘有什么要求
[00:00:49] 尽管讲来本帅
[00:00:52] 能做到的一定满足你的要求
[00:00:59] 后来这窦仙童自己掐自己大腿一下
[00:01:04] 媳妇
[00:01:05] 我怎么了
[00:01:06] 在关键时刻我怎么打退堂鼓了
[00:01:09] 我不说
[00:01:10] 谁替我说我的终身大事由我来决定
[00:01:15] 我就豁出去了
[00:01:17] 能怎么的
[00:01:19] 最后斗先涂那个脸
[00:01:21] 那涨得通红
[00:01:23] 眼光不敢看
[00:01:25] 薛丁山说那话
[00:01:28] 反正也能听见
[00:01:30] 也听不太清
[00:01:32] 可心里发虚
[00:01:35] 要那么熟
[00:01:37] 我还有个小小的要求啊
[00:01:40] 说吧
[00:01:41] 薛丁山在马上伸着脖子仔细听
[00:01:45] 不知道这姑娘犯什么病了
[00:01:48] What
[00:01:51] 我今年2918 岁
[00:01:55] 尚未许配人家
[00:01:58] 保媒的可不少
[00:02:01] 找了不少人
[00:02:02] 我我全看着不顺眼
[00:02:05] 我已经发下誓愿我我要许配给一个人
[00:02:11] 恳请二路元帅给我做主
[00:02:14] 薛丁山这才听明白啊啊嘿
[00:02:17] 哈哈哈
[00:02:18] 还没想到自己身上
[00:02:21] 后来薛丁山脸也红了
[00:02:23] 哎哎哎啊
[00:02:24] 原来如此
[00:02:25] 是啊
[00:02:27] 男大当婚女大当嫁嘛
[00:02:30] 但不知姑娘你相中谁了
[00:02:33] 本帅要能给出力的话
[00:02:35] 我是绝不袖手旁观
[00:02:38] 嗯
[00:02:38] 你看中谁了
[00:02:39] 说吧
[00:02:40] 不这切切我
[00:02:44] 我就相中了你了
[00:02:46] 谁骂你呀
[00:02:50] 我打算以身相许陪伴二路元帅
[00:02:55] 哦啊啊
[00:02:58] 这才听明白
[00:02:59] 闹了半天是我呀
[00:03:00] 呵呵
[00:03:02] 薛丁山事关工长砌垒
[00:03:05] 脸红脖子粗
[00:03:08] 当时脑筋就蹦起来
[00:03:11] 三分钟没说出话来
[00:03:14] 媳妇儿
[00:03:14] 他也害臊
[00:03:17] 封建年代
[00:03:18] 男女他脸皮儿都薄啊
[00:03:20] 怎么
[00:03:22] 不像现在这么开花
[00:03:25] 俩人一见面没两天
[00:03:26] 他就跳舞去了
[00:03:28] 在没两天去旅游去了
[00:03:29] 要不同居了那年头行吗
[00:03:33] 人笑掉大牙呀
[00:03:35] 那玩意儿结婚
[00:03:37] 不管穷富得有三媒六证
[00:03:41] 哪有当面锣对面鼓啊
[00:03:43] 就提婚事的
[00:03:44] 嗯
[00:03:45] 真出乎薛丁山意料之外的薛丁山呢
[00:03:50] 小伙子多狂傲
[00:03:53] 杨通四海目无一切
[00:03:56] 所说的不指的是能耐
[00:03:59] 就是为人处事
[00:04:01] A
[00:04:01] 所有的事儿
[00:04:03] 他都那么骄傲
[00:04:05] 尤其他的婚姻大事
[00:04:07] 他虽然没有认真地想过
[00:04:10] 但是有一点可以肯定
[00:04:12] 那得冠冕堂皇
[00:04:14] 嗯
[00:04:15] 他得相中那个人得三媒六证
[00:04:18] 样样稳妥才行
[00:04:20] 无论如何
[00:04:21] 没想到一个大姑娘都仙童当着面儿要以身相许
[00:04:26] J 镇薛丁山本能地就起了一种反感的逆反心理
[00:04:32] 薛丁山
[00:04:33] 进而建梅到处把脸沉起来
[00:04:37] 嗯
[00:04:39] 住口
[00:04:42] 把窦仙童吓得一哆嗦哈
[00:04:45] 你干嘛呢
[00:04:48] 我说
[00:04:48] 窦仙童啊
[00:04:50] 你真不知道天下还有可耻二字
[00:04:56] 你那脸皮有多厚啊
[00:04:58] 嗯
[00:04:59] 哎
[00:04:59] 你居然能在我的面前提起婚事来
[00:05:03] 我能要你吗
[00:05:05] 你怎么想来的
[00:05:06] 嗯
[00:05:07] 你怎么盘算的
[00:05:09] 呀呀呸
[00:05:11] 我都替你害臊啊
[00:05:15] 你真是吊死鬼
[00:05:16] 擦胭粉
[00:05:17] 死不要脸
[00:05:22] 话不多
[00:05:23] 太有分量了
[00:05:26] 高
[00:05:26] 谁能吃的消
[00:05:28] 谁能接受得了
[00:05:30] 呢黄花大闺女叫薛丁山
[00:05:35] 鼻子不是鼻子
[00:05:36] 脸不是脸
[00:05:36] 这么一挖苦
[00:05:39] 窦仙童
[00:05:39] 可受不了呢
[00:05:40] 脸刷就变了
[00:05:43] 气的是芳心乱跳
[00:05:45] 玉皮不安
[00:05:48] 身上是抖如筛糠薛丁山
[00:05:57] 你不要觉得你有什么了不起
[00:06:01] 你别觉得你们家门头有多高
[00:06:04] 你看错人啦
[00:06:06] 你把我逗仙童挖苦的一钱不值啦
[00:06:11] 我并非呢下贱之辈
[00:06:13] 我再告诉你
[00:06:14] 三条腿的蛤蟆不好找
[00:06:17] 两条腿的活人有的是
[00:06:21] 天下不是你
[00:06:22] 一个薛丁山比你强的人大有人在
[00:06:27] 我可告诉你欺负人
[00:06:31] 你说话损你太缺德
[00:06:36] 道咸同气哭了
[00:06:38] 薛丁山一看这怎么办
[00:06:41] 丫头醒醒
[00:06:42] 这篇儿揭过去
[00:06:44] 你又是对头的仇家
[00:06:47] 我是滚
[00:06:48] 你是肥
[00:06:50] 别的话少说
[00:06:52] 赶紧摘下你的大刀决一死战
[00:06:56] 好爸
[00:06:57] 好爸薛丁山
[00:07:00] 既然你如此不近人情
[00:07:03] 姑娘我就没说
[00:07:05] 你拿那个来吧
[00:07:08] 摘下秋水雁翎刀
[00:07:10] 跟薛丁山就站在一处
[00:07:14] 这就叫反目成仇
[00:07:18] 那个窦仙童受鸣人传授高人指教
[00:07:22] 不是没能耐跟薛丁山等站在一块儿
[00:07:25] 刀戟并举
[00:07:28] 50 回合没分输赢
[00:07:30] 哎呀
[00:07:31] 雪定啥呀行a
[00:07:34] 看这姑娘羞答答
[00:07:36] 长得这么苗条
[00:07:38] 没想到有这么棒的武艺
[00:07:42] 刀法出众果然厉害我要多加谨慎
[00:07:47] 如不加谨慎
[00:07:49] 还得吃亏呢
[00:07:51] 因此
[00:07:51] 薛丁山抖擞精神力战窦仙童
[00:07:56] 答的60多个照面
[00:07:58] 窦仙童不行
[00:08:00] 哎呀
[00:08:01] 都先从一开始薛丁山越战越勇啊
[00:08:04] 两个也打不过他
[00:08:05] 嗯
[00:08:06] 逢强智取
[00:08:08] 遇弱活擒
[00:08:10] 薛丁山呢
[00:08:11] 休怪我下毒手啊
[00:08:13] 我飞出出这口恶气不成
[00:08:15] 你把我损透了你
[00:08:18] 窦仙童想的是
[00:08:20] 虚晃一刀是拨马便走
[00:08:23] 薛丁山贪功的心切是紧追不舍
[00:08:27] 越过小山坡
[00:08:29] 穿过树林儿奔棋盘山的后山
[00:08:32] 斗仙同志打马如飞
[00:08:35] 薛丁山追了一程
[00:08:37] 一琢磨不行
[00:08:39] 远离战场
[00:08:41] 我地理不熟
[00:08:43] 一旦中了埋伏
[00:08:44] 如何了得得不追她
[00:08:48] 犹豫了一下嘛
[00:08:49] D 速度减慢
[00:08:51] 打出了原路
[00:08:52] 他回去都先从回头一看他不注意了
[00:08:56] 都先从把马博回来了a
[00:08:59] 薛丁山
[00:09:01] 你不是将门虎子吗
[00:09:03] 你不是龙虎状元十宝大将吗
[00:09:06] 你别唬人了
[00:09:08] 你胆小如鼠你敢追我吗
[00:09:11] 你敢追姑奶奶吗
[00:09:13] 我借你个胆子要没这个种你就逃命去吧
[00:09:18] 你咪咪你气死我也
[00:09:23] 薛丁山怕刚
[00:09:25] 嗯
[00:09:26] 赵贤同志一刚
[00:09:27] 他他火儿上来
[00:09:29] 头脑一发热
[00:09:30] 不想回去了
[00:09:32] 催马就追
[00:09:33] 哎
[00:09:34] 就这样
[00:09:35] 窦仙童跑一阵激他几句
[00:09:39] 薛丁山一上火就追一程
[00:09:42] 追来追去追去追来再找窦仙童
[00:09:46] 踪迹不见月月
[00:09:52] 哎哟
[00:09:53] 薛丁山一看坏了
[00:09:56] 光顾追她了
[00:09:58] 没变方向
[00:09:59] 这是什么地方
[00:10:01] 周围是大山环抱
[00:10:03] 左一山又一岭
[00:10:05] 沟沟岔岔两旁边全是古木
[00:10:09] 狼林呢
[00:10:11] 回头看连道都看不着了
[00:10:14] 也不知道两军阵前在哪儿呢
[00:10:17] 薛丁山心知不妙坏了
[00:10:20] 我上当了
[00:10:23] 赶紧回去
[00:10:25] 拨转马头东一头西一头
[00:10:28] 怎么转也找不着道儿
[00:10:32] 正在他转悠的时候
[00:10:35] 就突然觉着战马马失前蹄
[00:10:39] 那战马呢
[00:10:40] 提子往下一软块
[00:10:43] 正好掉进旋坑
[00:10:46] 原来啊
[00:10:47] 这是人家棋盘山的埋伏区啊
[00:10:49] 周围全是旋井
[00:10:52] 人家作为山王
[00:10:54] 怕有人攻山破寨
[00:10:56] 事先能没有防范骂窦仙童就是故意把他领到这儿来的比薛丁山能耐再大
[00:11:05] 道路不熟又不能掐会算
[00:11:08] 那不吃亏等什么
[00:11:10] 幸亏J 旋坑啊
[00:11:12] 还不太深
[00:11:13] 两张左右吧
[00:11:15] 底下布满了柴草跟白灰
[00:11:18] 啊
[00:11:18] 裤衩子一下来
[00:11:21] 哎呀
[00:11:21] 白辉腾网上一起
[00:11:24] 把薛丁山给呛得咔咔光咳嗽了
[00:11:29] 两只眼睛什么也看不见
[00:11:33] 再说都相同
[00:11:35] 驳转马头一看
[00:11:37] 行了
[00:11:38] 嘿嘿
[00:11:38] 薛丁山我叫你
[00:11:39] 哼
[00:11:40] 我叫你觉得自己不含糊
[00:11:43] 这回你吃了亏了
[00:11:46] 他一伸手在白狼之中
[00:11:49] 拿出骨头磕的之少
[00:11:52] 往嘴里地标粘en
[00:11:56] 这事儿听得非常非常远
[00:11:59] 埋伏在左右的喽
[00:12:01] 兵听到了哨声
[00:12:04] 是伏兵四起
[00:12:05] 华来到近前
[00:12:11] 窦仙童分配来
[00:12:13] 用挠钩套索连人带马给我打捞上来
[00:12:18] 干啥呀
[00:12:20] 四五十把勾子那大、青竹杆、白蜡杆前头都有小沟
[00:12:27] 那彪形大汉把坑口给围住
[00:12:30] 连人带马蹬钩住了一觉
[00:12:33] 号12 22
[00:12:38] 连人带马全给勾上来
[00:12:40] 最后把毒龙即也勾上来了
[00:12:44] 薛丁山呛的都上不来
[00:12:46] 气儿哪还有抵抗能力
[00:12:49] 被人家摁倒在地
[00:12:52] 五花大绑
[00:12:55] 就这样都相同啊
[00:12:57] 还挺心疼的
[00:12:58] 薛丁山
[00:13:00] 心里说话小鬼
[00:13:03] 哎
[00:13:04] 谁让你不答应我的婚事
[00:13:07] 你还把我羞涩一顿
[00:13:08] 不然我能下的狠手吗
[00:13:11] 来呀
[00:13:12] 快去提水拿毛巾he
[00:13:16] 捞了冰
[00:13:17] 提了几桶水
[00:13:18] 把薛丁山的脸、手、嘴全给他冲干净了
[00:13:24] 拿毛巾擦个不得理儿
[00:13:26] 薛丁山这才把眼睛睁开
[00:13:29] 但是已经被绑了
[00:13:31] 薛丁山是怒横眉咬碎钢牙丫头
[00:13:38] 这不算你的能耐
[00:13:41] 我是误中奸计
[00:13:43] 死也不服
[00:13:45] 薛丁山呢
[00:13:46] 哼哼
[00:13:47] 你服也好
[00:13:49] 不服也好
[00:13:51] 终于你做了截下地球图啊
[00:13:55] 姑奶奶上嘴唇一碰下嘴唇就能叫你尸首两分
[00:14:02] 你信不信
[00:14:03] 嗯
[00:14:04] 我请问你
[00:14:05] 你跟你老师学习的时候
[00:14:07] 你老师怎么教给你的就交给你嘴那么损
[00:14:13] 你把我损得那样啊
[00:14:16] 薛丁山瞪眼了
[00:14:19] 像你这种无耻之徒就得损你
[00:14:23] 你随便确定啥
[00:14:25] 那我最后我再问你一句
[00:14:30] 你要愿意一笔勾销
[00:14:33] 没有话说
[00:14:35] 咱们服就如初
[00:14:37] 姑奶奶以身相许
[00:14:40] 服侍你到老率领我这1万来人马归顺大唐交出扫北王罗通里面
[00:14:48] 三星a
[00:14:50] 你要胆敢说个不字
[00:14:53] 现在我就要你的命
[00:14:54] 你信不信到先同你痴心妄想
[00:14:59] 没门儿不答应就是不答应啊
[00:15:06] 来人啊
[00:15:08] 把他推在山坡下
[00:15:09] 脑袋给我砍下来
[00:15:12] 窦仙童真奇怪
[00:15:14] 漏兵答应一声
[00:15:16] 往上一闯
[00:15:18] 揪住薛丁山绑上拽着这个大夫往山坡下边推
[00:15:25] 就这这窦仙童这个心呢
[00:15:27] 都开了锅了
[00:15:29] 骑虎难下
[00:15:31] 你说怎么办
[00:15:32] 没有退身之地了
[00:15:35] 要逼着这个看经上就得杀薛丁山呢
[00:15:39] 就在这颈关节腰的关头
[00:15:42] 突然有人喊了一声哟
[00:15:46] 待姑娘舍不得
[00:15:51] 没人啊
[00:15:54] 没人来啦
[00:15:58] 这嗓子又粗又憨
[00:16:00] 都听出多远去
[00:16:03] 窦仙童吓了一跳
[00:16:04] 是谁这是
[00:16:06] 立马横刀
[00:16:07] 仔细观瞧
[00:16:09] 就见山坡上一瓦汤帆来了一个人
[00:16:15] 到了近前
[00:16:15] 才看清白发苍苍
[00:16:18] 腆着大肚子
[00:16:20] 手端车轱辘大斧子
[00:16:24] 他不认得是谁
[00:16:26] 来者非别
[00:16:27] 正是老成成妖精
[00:16:31] 你看
[00:16:32] 这程咬金一辈子净干这事儿
[00:16:35] 他怎么来的程咬金官拜总监军
[00:16:40] 薛丁山在前面开兵见仗
[00:16:43] 他在后边给料镇
[00:16:45] 老程啊
[00:16:46] 再回头看着他就发现今天这个情景特殊
[00:16:52] 程咬金
[00:16:52] 你看那么大年纪了
[00:16:53] 眼神还挺好使
[00:16:56] 他在后边一看
[00:16:57] 哎呦
[00:16:57] 这姑娘怎么长得这么漂亮
[00:16:59] 一看那姑娘说话声音不高跟
[00:17:03] 薛丁山说话的时候眉目传情
[00:17:07] 你眼睛会说话
[00:17:10] 老陈抻着脖子仔细听
[00:17:12] 也没听见什么
[00:17:13] 他离得远
[00:17:15] 程咬金心里暗笑有门儿啊
[00:17:18] 哎哎哎
[00:17:20] 这漂亮小伙儿是吸引人呢
[00:17:22] 大姑娘都喜欢我这姑娘干嘛
[00:17:25] 这是眉飞色舞
[00:17:26] 他俩谈什么呢
[00:17:28] N 吧
[00:17:28] N
[00:17:29] 后来老成就发现呢
[00:17:31] 姑娘拨转马头奔山坡
[00:17:34] 薛丁山跟着去把两军阵前的事儿扔这儿
[00:17:37] 不管了
[00:17:38] 程咬金
[00:17:39] 你想是什么意思
[00:17:40] 这是
[00:17:41] 哎哎
[00:17:42] 我得听听我我看看怎么回事儿
[00:17:45] 他偷偷的在后头跟着
[00:17:49] 但是他迟来了一步
[00:17:51] 等他赶到树林小山坡的时候
[00:17:54] 薛丁山跟窦仙童说翻出了树林跑下去了
[00:17:59] 老程在后面是紧追不舍
[00:18:02] 就这么的差了一段时间
[00:18:04] 因此薛丁山被人家抓住
[00:18:07] 程咬金才赶到
[00:18:09] 但他听了几句话
[00:18:11] 就听着窦仙童说
[00:18:12] 你要答应了
[00:18:13] 一笔勾销
[00:18:14] 没有话说不答应
[00:18:15] 今天我就杀你程咬金经验多丰富
[00:18:20] 就从这一句话里完备完备
[00:18:23] 18 de j 滋味
[00:18:25] 啊啊啊
[00:18:26] 明白了
[00:18:27] 明白了
[00:18:28] 哈哈哈
[00:18:29] 故此她大吼一声
[00:18:31] 没人来也
[00:18:33] 到了近前
[00:18:35] 窦仙童一看这老头子
[00:18:38] 精气神倒挺十足
[00:18:41] 看了半天不认识呀
[00:18:44] 你是何人丫头
[00:18:47] 连我他妈你都不认得
[00:18:49] 嗯
[00:18:51] 我说夏明王窦建德是你什么人呢
[00:18:55] 我爷爷嗨
[00:18:56] 我跟窦建德是磕头的把兄弟我姓程叫程瑶金那过去做过混世魔王
[00:19:06] 大德天子当过18 国的都蒙主
[00:19:10] 现在官拜鲁国公
[00:19:14] 哎哟
[00:19:14] 你看程咬金那名儿太大了
[00:19:17] 夫儒皆知
[00:19:19] 那比薛丁山的名要大得多得多呀
[00:19:23] 窦仙童闻听
[00:19:24] 此言改变了态度哦
[00:19:29] 闹了半天
[00:19:29] 您是常老前辈啊
[00:19:32] 什么老前辈耶
[00:19:34] 正经地爷爷a
[00:19:37] 我孙女
[00:19:39] 你不用说了
[00:19:40] 我全听明白了
[00:19:42] 有什么话跟爷爷说
[00:19:45] 谁让咱们子一辈父一辈的交情呢
[00:19:47] 爷爷给做主
[00:19:49] 丫头别抹不开
[00:19:52] 当着亲人别说假话
[00:19:53] 究竟怎么回事儿
[00:19:55] 刀下留人
[00:19:56] 先别杀别杀
[00:20:00] 窦仙童野豁出去了
[00:20:01] 鼻子翅一扇
[00:20:02] 忽觉着委屈
[00:20:04] 眼泪掉下成瘾
[00:20:07] 他是这么这么这么这么
[00:20:10] 窦仙童啊
[00:20:11] 真行啊
[00:20:12] 豪美隐瞒把心里怎么想的
[00:20:15] 刚才怎么跟薛丁山说的e 网经过讲述一遍
[00:20:19] 甚至把薛丁山说那些话也都说了
[00:20:23] 程咬金听完点点头
[00:20:25] 孙女儿
[00:20:26] 你做的太对了
[00:20:27] 深明大义
[00:20:30] 爷爷
[00:20:31] 我双手欢迎啊
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