《A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying》歌词

歌曲： A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying

所属专辑：Show Us Your Hits (International Version)

歌手： Bloodhound Gang

时长： 05:38

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A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying - Bloodhound Gang[00:00:01]

I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert[00:00:08]

That night I strolled on into[00:00:12]

Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love[00:00:15]

It had been a while[00:00:18]

In fact three hundred and sixty five had come and went[00:00:20]

Since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10[00:00:23]

I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons[00:00:28]

Through a pair of Daisy Duke cut offs and one of those[00:00:31]

Fruit of the loom tank tops[00:00:34]

Well that night I lost myself to ruby red lips[00:00:36]

Milky white skin and baby blue eyes[00:00:39]

Name was Russell[00:00:44]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:00:46]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:00:55]

Well I find it's quite a thrill[00:01:04]

When she grinds me against her will[00:01:08]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:01:13]

Well faster than you can say shallow grave[00:01:24]

This pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls[00:01:27]

Like hard boiled eggs in a tube sock[00:01:30]

Said her name was Bambi[00:01:33]

And I said well that's a coincidence darlin'[00:01:35]

'Cause I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer[00:01:37]

Well she smiled had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern[00:01:41]

And I went on to tell her how I would wear her face like a mask[00:01:44]

As I do my little kooky dance[00:01:48]

And then she told me to shush[00:01:51]

I guess she could sense my desperation[00:01:53]

'Course[00:01:56]

It's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like Minnie Pearl[00:01:56]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:01:59]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:02:09]

Well I find it's quite a thrill[00:02:18]

When she grinds me against her will[00:02:22]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:02:27]

So Bambi's goin' on about[00:02:37]

How she can make all my fantasies come true[00:02:39]

So I says even this one I have where Jesus Christ[00:02:42]

Is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole[00:02:46]

With a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something[00:02:48]

Resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on[00:02:51]

Santa Claus's tummy tum[00:02:53]

Well ten beers twenty minutes and thirty dollars later[00:02:55]

I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean[00:02:58]

Got to nail her back at her trailer[00:03:02]

Heh that rhymes[00:03:04]

I have to admit it was even more of a turn on[00:03:07]

When I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula[00:03:11]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:03:13]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:03:21]

Well I find it's quite a thrill[00:03:32]

When she grinds me against her will[00:03:36]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:03:41]

Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch[00:03:49]

Gave the tranny a spin and slid on into the stinky pinky gulp[00:03:54]

N' guzzle big rig snooze a stop[00:03:57]

There I was browsin' through the latest issue of Throb[00:04:00]

When I saw Bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton[00:04:03]

Well my heart just dropped[00:04:07]

So I decided to do what any good christian would[00:04:10]

You can not imagine[00:04:14]

How difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice[00:04:15]

And polish the one eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five[00:04:18]

In an eighteen-wheeler[00:04:20]

I never thought missing children could be so sexy[00:04:23]

Did I say that out loud[00:04:26]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:04:28]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:04:37]

Well I find it's quite a thrill[00:04:46]

When she grinds me against her will[00:04:51]

Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'[00:04:55]